Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Ответ был понятным, но нужно убрать паузы и неясные выражения, дать прямое утверждение, добавить одну-две конкретные детали и связку. Например, начните с ясного топик‑предложения, затем укажите, где/когда и с кем вы катались, и закончите кратким результатом или ощущением. Избегайте лишних слов (например, «uh») и замените разговорные фразы на более естественные формулировки.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I rode it almost every day around my neighborhood with my friends, and we often raced each other after school. Because of that, I became confident riding on busy streets.

提案: Ответ содержит идеи, но сформулирован неструктурированно и с повторяющимися словами. Нужно начать с чёткого мнения, затем объяснить причину с одной-двумя специфическими деталями и использовать связки (for example, however, because). Также избегайте разговорных сокращений и частых «uh».

例: I think bicycles are popular in some parts of my country. For example, in suburban towns people often cycle because there are wide bike lanes and low traffic; however, in large cities like mine cycling is less common because streets are narrow and crowded.

× Yeah, sure, I had a bike and I really enjoyed riding it, but I always, uh, got insured.

✓ Yeah, sure, I had a bike and I really enjoyed riding it, but I was always careful about safety.

The phrase 'got insured' is unnatural in this context; it implies purchasing insurance which is unlikely for a child's bicycle. The issue is lexical and tense-related: 'got insured' (simple past passive idea) is awkward here. Replacing with 'was always careful about safety' keeps past tense and conveys the intended meaning. Suggestion: use clear verbs appropriate to the meaning (e.g., 'wore a helmet', 'was always careful').

× Yeah, I think, uh, it's really popular in my country, but only in the cities where, uh, the roads, uh, are allowed to ride it.

✓ Yeah, I think it's really popular in my country, but only in the cities where the roads allow riding them.

The original sentence has awkward phrasing 'the roads are allowed to ride it' which misuses passive structure and pronoun reference. The problem falls under present tense/voice and sentence structure: use active present tense 'roads allow' and match pronoun number 'them' to 'bikes'. Also remove unnecessary 'are' to form a correct clause. Suggestion: use active verbs and ensure pronouns agree with their antecedents.

× But in the big cities where I live now, it's not that popular 'cause the roads are really smaller.

✓ But in the big cities where I live now, it's not that popular because the roads are much narrower.

'The roads are really smaller' is incorrect comparative phrasing and uses 'smaller' without a reference; 'much narrower' is the correct comparative adjective. Also 'smaller' should compare two items; use 'narrower' for roads. The contraction ' 'cause' is informal; use 'because' in speaking tests. Suggestion: use correct comparative adjective forms and avoid colloquial contractions in formal responses.