Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally clear and relevant, but you can improve by giving a stronger topic sentence and adding one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid vague adjectives like “cute” without context; instead, describe features or a memorable experience. Keep it concise (no more than five sentences).

例: Yes — I had a small bicycle that I used to ride to secondary school every day. Because it was lightweight and had a comfortable seat, I could ride quickly on narrow roads, which saved me about 15 minutes each way. For example, I remember racing my friend to the school gate most mornings, which made the journey fun.

提案: The idea is understandable but the answer is unclear and disfluent due to hesitations and incomplete sentences. To improve, give a clear topic sentence, then provide two specific reasons with linking words (e.g., “because” and “for example”). Practice fluent phrasing and avoid filler sounds. Aim for coherent, specific details (where, who uses them, and why).

例: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in my country because many people use them for short trips and commuting. For example, students often cycle to school and office workers cycle to nearby stations, since it is inexpensive and convenient in crowded cities.

× Yes, I used my bike to go to school every day when I was starting at secondary school.

✓ Yes, I used my bike to go to school every day when I was starting secondary school.

The original sentence is mostly correct but wordiness and preposition choice can be improved. 'Starting at secondary school' is awkward; native usage is 'starting secondary school' or 'when I started secondary school.' The sentence uses past tense consistently ('used') so tense is fine. Suggest simpler phrasing: 'when I started secondary school.'

× It was a cute and small vehicle.

✓ It was a small, cute vehicle.

The order of adjectives in English usually places size before opinion: 'small' then 'cute.' Also 'vehicle' is correct but sounds formal for a bike; 'bike' would be more natural: 'It was a small, cute bike.' This is an adjective order issue and word choice to improve naturalness.

× Yes I do, because whenever I go outside I can easily see uh, my and uh.

✓ Yes, I do, because whenever I go outside I can easily see many bikes.

The original is incomplete and contains filler words ('uh') and missing nouns. The intended meaning is that the speaker often sees bikes outside. This is a sentence structure and word omission problem; correcting by providing the missing noun ('bikes') and removing fillers makes the sentence grammatical and clear.

× Many by running. Me A school.

✓ Many people ride bikes, and many children use them to go to school.

These fragments are ungrammatical and unclear. 'Many by running' appears to attempt to say 'many are riding' or 'many people ride' and 'Me A school' seems to mean 'to go to school' or 'when I was at school.' The correction supplies complete clauses, correct subject-verb structure ('many people ride bikes') and a clear reference to school travel. This fixes sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and missing words.