Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve clarity, grammar and coherence. Start with a direct topic sentence answering the question, correct tenses and pronouns, and avoid unnecessary or incorrect words. Use 2–3 brief supporting sentences with linking words (e.g. 'and', 'but', 'so') and specific details (who, when, where). Keep total length under five sentences.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My father bought it for me and taught me how to ride it when I was about seven, and I fell a few times at first. However, after practising in the park for a few weeks, I could ride confidently.

提案: Make your opinion clear, use correct vocabulary (e.g. 'shared bikes' or 'bike-sharing'), and provide specific reasons with linking words. Fix grammar (word order, articles, verb forms) and give an example or result to support your view. Keep sentences concise and natural.

例: Yes, I do. Shared bikes are very common in my city, and many people use them to travel short distances or to get to subway stations because they are convenient and affordable. For example, commuters often ride a shared bike from their home to the nearest station to save time.

× Of course, when was your child?

✓ Of course, when I was a child?

The student used the wrong subject pronoun and word order. The question asks about their childhood, so the correct subject is 'I' not 'your'. Also maintain the past tense clause 'when I was a child'. Suggestion: use the correct pronoun to match the speaker and keep the clause 'when I was a child'.

× My dad bought a bag for me and taught me how to ride a bike.

✓ My dad bought a bike for me and taught me how to ride it.

The student wrote 'bought a bag' which is likely a word choice error (wrong noun). Also pronoun reference is improved by replacing the second 'bike' with 'it'. Suggestion: use the correct noun 'bike' and use a pronoun to avoid repetition.

× I fall several times, but I have already know how to ride a bike.

✓ I fell several times, but I already knew how to ride a bike.

The sentence mixes present simple 'I fall' with present perfect 'I have already know', and uses incorrect verb forms. Because the events are in the past, use past simple 'fell' and past simple or past perfect for knowing; the correct past simple of 'know' is 'knew'. Also 'have already know' is ungrammatical: if using present perfect it would be 'have already learned', but here past simple 'already knew' matches the narrative. Suggestion: keep tense consistent (past) and use correct past forms: 'fell' and 'knew'.

× Yes I do, sharing back can see everywhere in our country and people also usually use it to underground station is convenient.

✓ Yes, I do. Shared bikes can be seen everywhere in our country, and people often use them to get to the underground station because it is convenient.

This sentence has multiple structural problems: word order, noun choice 'sharing back' should be 'shared bikes', passive construction needed 'can be seen', and the clause about using them is ungrammatical ('use it to underground station is convenient'). I corrected it to two sentences for clarity, used plural agreement 'bikes' with 'them', and added 'get to' and 'because it is convenient' to express purpose and reason. Suggestion: use clearer noun phrases ('shared bikes'), correct passive or active verbs ('can be seen'), maintain subject-verb agreement, and use prepositions and infinitives correctly ('get to the underground station').