Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and organize your answer: start with a clear topic sentence, then give 1–2 specific supporting details using linking words. Correct basic grammar (articles, tense, subject-verb agreement) and avoid repetition. Aim for 2–3 sentences, e.g. mention why you wanted a bike and how you used to ride (with friends) and finish with a brief current situation.

例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child, but I always wanted one because I enjoyed watching other children ride. For example, I often asked my friends if I could join them, and those rides helped me relax and have fun. Now I finally have a bike and I ride it regularly.

提案: Answer directly and use clear linking words to explain reasons and give a specific example. Fix grammar (plural forms, articles) and avoid filler words. Keep it to 2–3 sentences: state your opinion, give a clear reason, and add a brief example or result.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because cars are expensive while motorcycles and bicycles are much more affordable. As a result, many families own at least one bike, especially for short trips and commuting to work or school.

× 'No, I didn't have a bike when I was child but I love to have bike.'

✓ 'No, I didn't have a bike when I was a child, but I loved to have a bike.'

'was child' is missing the article 'a' and the clause refers to past habit or desire so present 'love' should be past 'loved' to match past time; also 'to have bike' needs article 'a'. Suggestion: use 'a child' and match tense: 'loved to have a bike.'

× 'I always enjoy seeing others riding bike so I wanted to ride.'

✓ 'I always enjoyed seeing others riding bikes, so I wanted to ride.'

'riding bike' needs plural or article: 'riding bikes' or 'riding a bike'. Also tense should match past narrative: 'enjoy' -> 'enjoyed'. Add comma before 'so'.

× 'Sometimes I ask my my friend to take a ride they sometimes give me as I win there a lot.'

✓ 'Sometimes I asked my friend to let me take a ride; they sometimes let me because I lived nearby.'

Sentence has repeated 'my', incorrect pronoun 'they' referring unclearly to singular friend, and 'give me as I win there a lot' is unclear. Correct by making past tense and using 'let me take a ride' and clarify reason 'because I lived nearby' or similar. Ensure pronouns agree with nouns.

× 'I keep me relaxed.'

✓ 'It kept me relaxed.'

Original sentence has incorrect reflexive construction 'keep me' with wrong tense and missing subject. In past narrative use 'It kept me relaxed.' If speaking generally, use 'It keeps me relaxed.'

× 'But now, right now I have a bike.'

✓ 'But now I have a bike.'

Redundant 'now, right now' is stylistic; present tense 'have' is correct, remove repetition for clarity. Use single 'now'.

× 'Yes absolutely buy gas very popular in our country.'

✓ 'Yes, absolutely bikes are very popular in our country.'

Sentence garbled: 'buy gas' is incorrect. Likely meant 'bikes are very popular'. Use present tense 'are' for current fact and plural 'bikes'. Add comma after 'Yes'.

× 'It is umm in in our country car are very expensive and bike are much affordable than cars, so at least all people uh many people have bike in our country, so bike are very popular every house every house there are some.'

✓ 'In our country, cars are very expensive and bikes are much more affordable than cars, so many people have bikes. Bikes are very popular; almost every household has one.'

Multiple issues: missing articles and plural agreement ('car' -> 'cars', 'bike' -> 'bikes'), comparative form requires 'much more affordable' or 'far more affordable', 'have bike' needs 'have bikes', and 'every house every house there are some' is repetitive and ungrammatical — replace with 'almost every household has one.' Ensure subject-verb agreement and correct articles.