Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and correct grammar, start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details linked logically. Avoid redundancy (e.g. "did not have" and "did not know how" overlap) and fix tense/articles: say "when I was a child." You can mention who rode bikes instead, when you learned, or how you felt about it for more richness.

例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. I was quite small and didn’t learn to ride until I was about ten, so my parents preferred I use a balance bike or be walked to school. As a result, I often felt left out when my friends rode around the neighbourhood.

提案: Begin with a clear opinion, then give two specific, well-linked reasons using correct phrasing and vocabulary. Use linking words (for example, because, furthermore, additionally) and more precise terms (e.g. "fuel-efficient", "cost-effective", "short-distance commuting"). Avoid vague phrases like "various reasons."

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country. For example, they are fuel-efficient and much cheaper to run than cars, which makes them ideal for short-distance commuting. Additionally, many cities have bike lanes and parking, so cycling is convenient and often faster during rush hour.

× No, I did not have a bike when I was child because then I was too short so I did not know how to ride a bike.

✓ No, I did not have a bike when I was a child because I was too short then, so I did not know how to ride a bike.

The phrase 'when I was child' is missing the definite article 'a' before 'child' (Article errors - ID 22). Also, the adverb 'then' is better placed after 'was' or moved to reduce awkwardness; punctuation separating clauses improves clarity. Suggestion: include the article 'a' ('a child') and reorder 'then' after 'was' or place it later, and add a comma before 'so' to join independent clauses correctly.

× Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because of various reasons. For example, bikes have a fuel efficiency so person can travel from one side to another side with cost effectively.

✓ Yes, bikes are very popular in my country for various reasons. For example, bikes are fuel-efficient, so a person can travel from one side to the other cost-effectively.

Multiple issues apply: 'because of various reasons' is wordy and non-idiomatic; 'for various reasons' is preferred (Sentence structure - ID 26). 'bikes have a fuel efficiency' is incorrect phrasing; use 'bikes are fuel-efficient' (Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs - ID 13). 'so person' needs the indefinite article 'a person' (Article errors - ID 22). 'from one side to another side' is redundant; use 'from one side to the other' (Sentence structure - ID 26). 'with cost effectively' misorders adverbial phrase; use the adverb form 'cost-effectively' after the verb or at the end. Suggestions: use concise idiomatic expressions, include necessary articles, and use adjective and adverb forms correctly.