Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Говорите более связно и без частых пауз и междометий. Начните с чёткого тематического предложения, затем добавьте подробности (кто купил, какого цвета велосипед, где вы катались) с использованием связок (for example, and, so). Избегайте лишних слов (uh, umm).

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My father bought it for me and it was a purple-blue bicycle. I used to ride it around our front yard and along the quiet street near our house. For example, I would cycle to my friend’s place every afternoon after school.

提案: Отвечайте полноценными предложениями и добавляйте конкретные причины и примеры. Используйте связующие слова (because, therefore, for example) и избегайте повторов («many many»). Дайте чёткое описание: где именно популярны велосипеды, кто ими пользуется и почему.

例: Yes, I think bikes are popular in my region of Russia because we have many green spaces and small towns, so cycling is convenient. Many people use bicycles for short trips and recreation, especially children and commuters. For example, on weekends families often ride along the parks and countryside paths.

× Uh, yes, I umm, I had bike, uh, my, uh, father bought uh, for me.

✓ Uh, yes, I, umm, I had a bike. My father bought it for me.

The sentence lacks the indefinite article 'a' before the singular count noun 'bike' and omits the object pronoun 'it' after 'bought'. Use 'a' with singular countable nouns when mentioning them for the first time. Also include the pronoun 'it' to show what the father bought. Improve fluency by splitting into two clear clauses and removing filler words.

× Purple bike or blue bike, uh, for my doorstep.

✓ It was a purple or blue bike that I kept by my doorstep.

The original fragment lacks a clear verb and article and reads like a list. Add the article 'a' and a verb phrase ('It was') to form a complete sentence. 'Purple or blue' should modify 'bike'. Clarify the location with 'kept by my doorstep.'

× Umm yes, because I live in South side of Russia and we have many many.

✓ Umm yes, because I live in the south of Russia and we have many green areas.

The phrase 'South side of Russia' is awkward; use 'the south of Russia' or 'the southern part of Russia.' The clause 'we have many many' is incomplete—add a noun like 'green areas' to complete the thought. Maintain article 'the' before 'south.'

× Umm, green places, Uh, not big town and it.

✓ We have many green places; there are no big towns, and it is peaceful.

The original contains fragments and unclear pronoun reference 'it.' Combine ideas into a complete sentence: state that there are no big towns and add a clear comment about 'it' (for example, 'it is peaceful'). Use 'there are' for plural noun 'big towns.'