Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition (e.g., "during my childhood" after saying "I was a child") and minor grammar errors (use articles and correct prepositions).

例: Yes — I had a bike as a child. My father bought it for me when I was six, and although I fell a few times while learning, I soon became confident riding around the neighborhood.

提案: Make one clear main point, avoid repetition and filler words, and use linking words to connect reasons and examples. Correct collocations (e.g., "commuting" not "commutation") and simplify phrasing. Provide a specific reason and an example to support your opinion.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because many people cannot afford cars. As a result, many commuters rely on motorbikes for daily travel, especially to get to work in busy cities.

× I enjoyed riding bike during my childhood.

✓ I enjoyed riding a bike during my childhood.

Missing article before countable noun 'bike' and using 'riding' is correct. Add the indefinite article 'a' to make 'a bike'. Suggestion: say 'enjoyed riding a bike'.

× My father bought me a bike when I was 6.

✓ My father bought me a bike when I was six.

Using the numeral '6' in informal speech is acceptable, but in writing it is better to spell out small numbers. No major grammar error otherwise; suggestion: write 'six' for clarity.

× I fell a few times and had some injuries during while learning to ride the bike.

✓ I fell a few times and had some injuries while learning to ride the bike.

Redundant words 'during while' create a sentence structure error. Use either 'during' + noun or 'while' + clause. Here 'while learning' is correct. Remove 'during'.

× But eventually I mastered the art of riding the bike.

✓ But eventually I mastered the art of riding a bike.

When speaking about a general ability, use 'a bike' or no article; 'the bike' implies a specific bike previously mentioned. Better: 'riding a bike' to indicate the general skill.

× Bikes are quite popular in my country people people can't afford cars because of their earning capacity.

✓ Bikes are quite popular in my country because many people can't afford cars due to their income levels.

Run-on sentence and repetition 'people people' cause structure errors. Also 'earning capacity' is awkward; use 'income levels' or 'low incomes'. Break into clause with 'because' and reorder for clarity.

× So many people prefer riding bikes.

✓ So many people prefer riding bikes.

Sentence is grammatically correct. No change needed. (Kept for completeness.)

× Apart from mechanical bikes, people prefer motorized motor motorbikes.

✓ Apart from mechanical bikes, people prefer motorized motorbikes.

Repetition 'motor motorbikes' is an error. Remove duplicated word. 'Motorized motorbikes' is slightly redundant; better: 'motorbikes' or 'motorized bikes'.

× In my country as well.

✓ This is true in my country as well.

Fragment 'In my country as well.' is a sentence fragment lacking a verb. Turn into a full sentence by adding a verb, e.g. 'This is true in my country as well.' Suggestion: avoid sentence fragments.

× Bikes are used for commutation and going to office.

✓ Bikes are used for commuting and for going to the office.

'Commutation' is a noun but uncommon in this context; use the gerund 'commuting'. Also include preposition 'for' before 'going' and article 'the' before 'office' for natural English: 'commuting and for going to the office.'