Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer direct and grammatically correct, with a clear timeline and fewer hesitations. Start with a simple topic sentence saying whether you had a bike, then give one or two brief, specific details (when you got it and why it was memorable). Use past tense consistently and avoid filler sounds.

例: Yes, I did have a bike when I was younger. I didn’t get it until I was about 20, because my family couldn’t afford one earlier; I remember learning to ride it in a nearby park and feeling very proud when I could cycle without help.

提案: Give a clear opinion, use correct comparative language, and support it with one specific reason or example. Use linking words (for example, because, however) and correct grammar (bikes are more popular than cars; they can save time in traffic). Keep it concise and avoid vague or inaccurate phrases like “serve more popular.”

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country because they are often faster than cars in crowded cities. For example, cyclists can weave through traffic and use bike lanes, which helps them reach work or school more quickly during rush hour.

× Yes, I would like when I am a child, but uh, uh, not early in the child. Uh, I got my bike at age of my 20.

✓ Yes, I liked having a bike when I was a child, but not when I was very young. I got my bike at the age of 20.

Multiple errors: 1) 'would like when I am a child' mixes present/modal with past context — use past simple 'liked' and past tense 'was' for childhood (Grammar Problem Type IDs 6 and 5). 2) 'not early in the child' is incorrect word order and noun choice — use 'not when I was very young' (Grammar Problem Type IDs 26 and 11). 3) 'I got my bike at age of my 20' has incorrect article and word order — correct form is 'I got my bike at the age of 20' (Article errors and sentence structure, IDs 22 and 26). Suggestions: keep tenses consistent (use past for past events), use natural phrasing 'when I was a child/when I was very young', and use the fixed expression 'at the age of 20' or 'when I was 20'.

× Yes, I serve more popular than cars because it can save you time to travel one country to other one city to other city because it can pass through a car.

✓ Yes, bicycles are more popular than cars because they can save you time when traveling from one city to another and can pass through traffic more easily than cars.

Errors and fixes: 1) 'I serve more popular' is incorrect subject and verb — use the plural subject 'bicycles are more popular' (Subject-verb agreement, IDs 27 and 1). 2) 'it can save you time to travel one country to other one city to other city' has wrong pronoun, prepositions and word order — use 'they can save you time when traveling from one city to another' (Incorrect use of pronouns and prepositions, IDs 12 and 11). 3) 'because it can pass through a car' is illogical and grammatically wrong — clarify 'can pass through traffic more easily than cars' (Sentence structure and word choice, ID 26). Suggestions: use correct subject matching (bicycles/they), use standard prepositional phrases 'from X to Y' and 'more easily than', and keep sentences concise and logical.