Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Clarify and simplify your response. Start with a clear topic sentence answering the question, then give two specific supporting details connected with linking words. Avoid repetition and incorrect word forms (e.g., "training wheels", "took it up", "gave up"). Pronunciation and grammar need attention: use past tense consistently and correct articles. Keep your answer to fewer than five sentences.

例: Yes. My parents bought me a bike when I was five. It had training wheels, and I only learned to ride without them when I was fourteen. However, I later stopped cycling regularly, so I didn’t pursue it further.

提案: Give a direct opinion first, then provide two clear, specific observations using linking words. Correct word choice and tense are important (e.g., "on my way to work", "I see", "I exercise"). Avoid unrelated or unclear phrases like "saw some movies with us". Keep sentences concise and coherent.

例: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in my country. For example, on my way to work I often see people cycling to their offices, and there are also organized cycling groups who meet for weekend rides.

× Yes, my parents bought it for me when I was five.

✓ Yes, my parents bought one for me when I was five.

The original sentence uses 'it' to refer to 'a bike' but in context 'a bike' was asked; using 'one' is clearer and avoids potential ambiguity. This is a clarity/style suggestion rather than a strict tense error; keep past tense 'bought' because the action happened in the past.

× I remember that it was training bills that I'd never taken up until I was 14.

✓ I remember that it had training wheels and I hadn't used them until I was 14.

The original sentence has wrong words ('training bills' instead of 'training wheels') and incorrect structure with the past perfect contraction 'I'd' causing confusion. Use 'had' for possession of training wheels and 'hadn't used' (past perfect) to show an action not done until a past time. This clarifies sequence: the wheels existed earlier and use did not occur until age 14.

× But because I learned how to use the two wheeled bike, but because I eventually gave up my dream.

✓ But even though I learned how to use a two-wheeled bike, I eventually gave up my dream.

The original sentence incorrectly repeats 'but because', creating a fragment and poor conjunction use. Remove the redundant 'but because' and use 'even though' or a single 'but' to connect the contrasting ideas. Also add hyphen in 'two-wheeled' and use 'a' before 'two-wheeled bike'. Ensure verb 'gave up' correctly follows subject 'I'.

× Yes, when I'm on my morning job, I saw some movies with us and I workout and I also saw some groups that they call themselves cyclists.

✓ Yes, when I go to my morning job, I see some people exercising and I work out, and I also see some groups who call themselves cyclists.

Multiple tense and word choice errors: 'I'm on my morning job' is awkward; use 'go to my morning job' (habitual present). 'I saw' should be present 'I see' to match habitual context. 'I workout' should be 'I work out' (verb phrase). 'some movies with us' is incorrect and likely meant 'people exercising' or 'people working out'. 'groups that they call themselves cyclists' is ungrammatical; use 'groups who call themselves cyclists' or 'groups that call themselves cyclists'. Ensure consistency by using present simple for habitual actions.