Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 문법과 시제 사용을 개선하세요. 과거 경험을 말할 때는 과거시제를 일관되게 쓰고, 불필요한 단어는 줄이며 문장을 간결하게 만드세요. 또한 구체적 세부사항(몇 살 때, 어디에서 타는지 등)을 추가하면 답변이 더 풍부해집니다. 연결어를 사용하여 문장을 자연스럽게 이어보세요. 예: 'Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My parents bought it for me when I was eight. It was white and I loved riding it around the neighborhood, but unfortunately it was stolen when I was ten.'

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My parents bought it for me when I was eight, and it was white. I often rode it around my neighborhood with my friends, and I remember feeling very proud of it. Unfortunately it was stolen when I was ten, which made me very sad.

提案: 답변을 더 구체적으로 만드세요. 일반적인 진술 뒤에 이유나 예시를 붙여 구체성을 높이고 연결어(For example, because, so)를 사용하여 논리를 명확히 하세요. 또한 어휘 다양성을 늘려 ‘ride a bicycle’ 대신 ‘cycle’나 ‘commute by bike’ 같은 표현을 섞어 쓰면 자연스럽습니다.

例: Yes, absolutely. Cycling is quite popular in my country because many people find it a cheap and healthy way to travel. For example, a lot of office workers commute by bike to avoid traffic jams, and cities have been adding more bike lanes to encourage this.