Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise, avoid hesitation fillers (umm, uh), and organize your answer with a clear topic sentence followed by one or two specific supporting details. Use correct grammar for possession and past habits (e.g., “my father had a bike” or “we used a bike”). Replace vague phrases (e.g., “whenever I used to *** ****”) with a clear reason or activity. Keep the answer within 3–4 sentences and use a linking word like “so” or “for example” to connect ideas.

例: I didn’t have my own bike as a child, but my father had one and we often used it together. For example, he would ride me to school sometimes, and we would go to the shop on his bike. So although I never owned a bike, it was a part of my childhood routine.

提案: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence, then give specific supporting details using linking words (for example, however, because). Avoid repetition (“are also really popular in my country” twice) and filler sounds. Clarify incomplete sentences (e.g., finish “petrol bikes are…”). Provide one or two concrete reasons or examples (traffic, affordability, climate) and keep to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are inexpensive and convenient for short journeys. For example, roads are often crowded with bikes and scooters during rush hour, and many people prefer them to avoid traffic jams.

× Umm honestly I still don't own a bike and I didn't have a bike when I was a child, but my father used to have a bike.

✓ Umm honestly I still don't own a bike and I didn't have a bike when I was a child, but my father used to have one.

Using 'a bike' repeatedly is grammatically acceptable but stylistically awkward. Replacing the second instance with 'one' avoids redundancy and sounds more natural. Suggestion: use pronouns like 'one' to refer back to a previously mentioned countable noun to improve cohesion.

× We used to own a bike and me and my father used to go to the shop to purchase something or he sometime used to drop me off uh, to the school whenever I used to *** ****.

✓ We used to own a bike, and my father and I used to go to the shop to buy things, or he sometimes used to drop me off at school whenever I had to go.

Multiple issues addressed: 'me and my father' is incorrect pronoun order and case; correct is 'my father and I'. 'Purchase something' is wordy and better as 'buy things'. 'Sometime' should be 'sometimes' (adverb). 'to the school' is usually 'at school' in this context. 'Whenever I used to *** ****' is unclear; likely intended meaning is 'whenever I had to go' or similar, so past simple 'had to go' fits. Also ensured subject-verb agreement and natural word order.

× If we go outside on the road, it is almost full with bike and I believe that in nowadays uh petrol bikes are.

✓ If we go out on the road, it is almost full of bikes, and I believe that nowadays petrol bikes are common.

Several preposition and article errors: 'go outside on the road' is better as 'go out on the road'. 'Full with bike' is incorrect; correct pattern is 'full of bikes' (plural). 'In nowadays' is wrong; use 'nowadays' alone. Sentence fragment 'petrol bikes are' needs a complement; adding 'common' completes the idea. Suggestions: use 'full of' for contents, pluralize countable nouns when talking generally, and place 'nowadays' without 'in'.