Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Исправьте грамматические ошибки времени и структуру предложений: используйте простое прошедшее (I had, my parents gave me) и говорите короче и по делу. Упорядочьте информацию: тема → ключный факт (возраст) → подробности (кто подарил, почему особенный). Избегайте лишних слов и повторов. Также используйте подходящую лексику (present → gave, designed by → designed by Mr Bragg).

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I got my first bike when I was twelve — my parents gave it to me for my birthday. It was a special model designed by a man called Mr Bragg from England, and I loved it.

提案: Сформулируйте мысль ясно: ответьте прямо (Yes/No), затем дайте причину и пример. Уточните слова (park → bike?; present → gift). Используйте связки (because, for example, especially) и избегайте лишних повторов. Приводите конкретные причины — удобство, цена, здоровье, традиция.

例: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in my country. Many parents buy them as birthday gifts because they are affordable and good for children’s health. For example, families often choose simple, sturdy bikes for kids aged five to twelve.

× Well, when I have been child, I have a great lullaby.

✓ Well, when I was a child, I had a great bicycle.

The speaker refers to a past time (childhood) so the past simple tense 'was' and 'had' should be used instead of 'have been' and 'have'. Also 'lullaby' is incorrect contextually; 'bicycle' fits the question about a bike. Use past simple for completed past states and possessions (was, had).

× The first one was when I have been 12 years old.

✓ The first one was when I was 12 years old.

Mixing present perfect 'have been' with a specific past age is incorrect. Use past simple 'was' to indicate a specific time in the past. When referring to age at a specific time, use 'was + age'. Suggestion: 'I was 12 years old' for specific past ages.

× My parents, uh, present to me when I have a, when I had the birthdays, those bike was especially designed for me by designs Mr. Bragg, what he had been from England and he, he designed especially for me when I have been 12 years.

✓ My parents gave it to me for my birthday when I was 12 years old. That bike was specially designed for me by Mr. Bragg, who was from England, and he designed it especially for me when I was 12.

Multiple issues: incorrect prepositions and verbs. Use 'gave it to me for my birthday' instead of 'present to me when I have a'. Use past simple 'gave', 'was', and 'designed' for past events. Use 'who' for people not 'what', and 'from England' is fine. Also 'specially' or 'especially' and correct object pronoun 'it'. Suggestion: keep verbs in past simple and use correct prepositions: 'for my birthday', use 'who' for people.

× Do you think bikes are popular in your country?

✓ Do you think bikes are popular in your country?

This sentence is correct. It uses present simple appropriately to ask about a general truth. No change needed.

× Well, in my opinion, I believe that park is the most popular, uh, things in my country, especially for a child during their birthday when they are coming and their parents make decision to present for their child children, the first one is the back, especially for a young age that is suitable and most popular.

✓ In my opinion, parks are very popular in my country, especially as birthday presents for children. The first gift many parents choose is a bike because it is suitable for young children and very popular.

Pronoun and noun number errors: use plural 'parks' not 'park' when speaking generally. 'Things' is vague; use 'gifts' or 'presents'. 'Their parents' is okay but restructure for clarity. 'Make decision to present for their child children' is incorrect; use 'choose as a present for their child'. 'The first one is the back' should be 'the first gift is the bike'. Use correct nouns and pluralization and simplify sentence structure. Suggestion: use plural nouns for general statements (parks, children), use 'present' as noun or 'present as' and ensure subject-verb agreement.