Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve accuracy, fluency and clarity. Keep answers within 3–4 concise sentences: start with a clear topic sentence, add one or two specific supporting details, and avoid hesitations and incorrect word choices. Correct word choice (e.g. 'ride' not 'rock' or 'wrote'), accurate prepositions ('around the neighborhood' not 'in the pubs'), and natural phrases ('let us burn off energy' or 'keep us active outdoors'). Use one or two linking words (for example, 'so' or 'and') to connect ideas smoothly.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child; I got it when I was six. I used to ride it with my brothers around the neighborhood in the evenings, and it was one of my favorite activities because it helped us burn off energy and stay active outdoors.

提案: Be more precise and natural, and expand with a specific reason or example. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one clear supporting detail with correct vocabulary and grammar. Use plural/singular agreement and correct verb forms (e.g. 'in the evenings', 'park their bikes', 'around the neighbourhood'). Add a reason or example to make the answer specific and convincing.

例: Yes, bicycles are very popular in my country. In the evenings you can see many people riding or parking their bikes around the neighbourhood, especially near parks and markets, because cycling is cheap and convenient for short trips.

× I had a bike when I was a child, I got it when I was 6.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child; I got it when I was six.

Run-on: two past-tense clauses need proper punctuation. Also write numbers under 10 as words in formal writing. Use a semicolon or period to separate independent clauses.

× I often rock it with my brothers around the neighborhoods, in the pubs and uh during the evenings, which was one of my favorite activities because it let us explode and be active outdoor.

✓ I often rode it with my brothers around the neighborhood, in parks and during the evenings, which was one of my favorite activities because it let us blow off steam and be active outdoors.

Multiple preposition and word choice errors: 'rock' is incorrect verb for riding a bike; use 'rode' (past tense). 'Neighborhoods' should be singular 'neighborhood' for the general area. 'In the pubs' is unlikely for biking; 'in parks' fits context. 'During the evenings' is fine. 'Explode' is wrong collocation; use 'blow off steam'. 'Active outdoor' needs adverb/adjective correction to 'active outdoors'. Corrections respect past tense context.

× Yes, bikes are definitely popular in my country.

✓ Yes, bikes are definitely popular in my country.

Sentence is grammatically correct and uses present simple appropriately to state a general fact. No change necessary.

× During evening you can see many people wrote their bikes in the pubs or around neighborhood.

✓ During the evenings you can see many people riding their bikes in parks or around the neighborhood.

Several errors: 'During evening' needs article and plural 'During the evenings'. 'Wrote' is wrong verb; use 'riding' (present participle) to describe ongoing activity. 'Their bikes in the pubs' is illogical; use 'riding their bikes in parks' and 'around the neighborhood' with 'the'.

× Especially many children will like it.

✓ Many children especially like them.

Original mixes future 'will like' with a general present-time statement. Use present simple 'like' to express habitual preference. Also 'it' is unclear; 'bikes' is plural so use 'them' or repeat 'bikes'. Reorder to 'Many children especially like bikes.' if explicit.