Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar (verb tense and agreement), pronunciation of key words, and clarity. Begin with a clear topic sentence, correct verb forms, and add one specific supporting detail. Use linking words to connect ideas but keep it concise (max 5 sentences). For example, correct “bought me a Pike” to “bought me a bike,” change “I just ride by everyday” to “I rode it every day,” and avoid filler words like “yeah.”

例: Yes, I did. My parents bought me a bike when I was in primary school, and I rode it to school every day. It helped me feel independent and I often rode with friends after classes.

提案: Work on clarity, accuracy, and organization. Start with a direct topic sentence (Yes/No), then give one or two clear reasons with correct grammar and specific details. Use linking words like “because” and “however.” Avoid vague or incorrect comparisons (e.g., “faster than boys”).

例: Not really. Because there are many cars and motorbikes on the roads, most people prefer motorbikes or cars for longer distances. However, some people still use bicycles for exercise or short trips in quieter neighborhoods.

× My parents bought me a Pike when I was in private school and I just ride by everyday to go to school and yeah.

✓ My parents bought me a bike when I was in private school and I just rode it by every day to go to school.

The sentence mixes past and present tenses. 'Bought' and 'was' are past, so 'ride' should be past 'rode'. Also 'bike' spelling corrected and 'everyday' should be two words 'every day' in this context. Include object 'it' after 'rode' for clarity. Suggestion: Keep past tense consistent: use 'rode' and write 'every day' as two words.

× My parents bought me a Pike when I was in private school and I just ride by everyday to go to school and yeah.

✓ My parents bought me a bike when I was in private school and I just rode it by every day to go to school.

The phrase 'ride by' is incorrect here; the intended meaning is that the student rode the bike to school. Use the past form 'rode' and include the object 'it'. 'Ride by' suggests passing by something; use simple 'rode it' instead. Suggestion: Use the correct verb phrase 'rode it' rather than 'ride by'.

× No, because in the road there are many cars and motorbikes and is really much faster than boys and people just use motorbike and cars for longer distance.

✓ No, because on the road there are many cars and motorbikes, and they are much faster than bicycles, so people just use motorbikes and cars for longer distances.

Multiple issues: preposition 'in the road' should be 'on the road' (preposition error). 'Is really much faster than boys' is ungrammatical and unclear; likely meant 'they are much faster than bikes'. Also 'motorbike and cars' should be plural 'motorbikes and cars'. Finally 'longer distance' should be plural 'longer distances'. Suggestion: Use correct preposition 'on', match plural nouns and pronouns ('they', 'motorbikes'), and compare with the correct noun ('bicycles').

× No, because in the road there are many cars and motorbikes and is really much faster than boys and people just use motorbike and cars for longer distance.

✓ No, because on the road there are many cars and motorbikes, and they are much faster than bicycles, so people just use motorbikes and cars for longer distances.

The preposition 'in' is wrong for roads; use 'on the road'. Also 'for longer distance' should be 'for longer distances'. Suggestion: Use 'on the road' and pluralize 'distances' when speaking generally.

× No, because in the road there are many cars and motorbikes and is really much faster than boys and people just use motorbike and cars for longer distance.

✓ No, because on the road there are many cars and motorbikes, and they are much faster than bicycles, so people just use motorbikes and cars for longer distances.

The sentence lacks an appropriate subject for 'is really much faster'; replace with 'they are' referring to cars and motorbikes. Also 'boys' is the wrong noun to compare; use 'bicycles' or 'bikes'. Suggestion: Use clear pronouns that agree with their antecedents and compare the correct objects.