Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct, concise, and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence answering the question, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases (e.g. “toy farm,” “A sense”). Use correct tense and subject-verb agreement. Aim for 2–4 sentences and include linking words (for example, “however,” “because,” or “so”) to connect ideas.

例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. However, I would have liked one because I enjoyed the idea of cycling around my neighborhood for fun and freedom. For example, my friends would ride to the park after school, and I wished I could join them.

提案: Your answer is clear and directly addresses the question, but you can improve naturalness and add a brief specific example. Use contractions and smoother linking words (e.g., “because,” “so,” “for instance”) and vary vocabulary slightly (“eco-friendly,” “commute”). Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are convenient and eco-friendly. For instance, many people use motorcycles or bicycles to commute to work in busy cities since they’re faster in traffic and much cheaper than cars.

× When I was quite young in my childhood, I did not have a bike really, but I would have preferred to have a bike because it gives me immense pleasure to ride on a bike around the streets in a toy, whether it be a toy in a toy farm or a real farm.

✓ When I was quite young, I did not have a bike, but I would have preferred to have one because it gave me immense pleasure to ride a bike around the streets, whether in a toy farm or a real farm.

The sentence mixes past reference with present-tense verbs. Use past tense consistently: 'did not have' and 'would have preferred' require related verbs in past form, so change 'gives' to 'gave'. Also simplify repetitive or unclear phrases: replace 'a bike' repetition with 'one', remove extra 'in my childhood' (redundant with 'When I was quite young'), and clarify 'in a toy' to 'in a toy farm'. Use articles correctly and remove unnecessary commas. Suggestions: keep tense consistent (past for past situations), avoid redundancy, and simplify awkward noun phrases.

× But riding a bike give me an A sense.

✓ But riding a bike gives me a sense of excitement.

The subject 'riding a bike' is a singular gerund phrase and requires the singular verb 'gives' not 'give'. 'A sense' is vague and incorrectly capitalized; provide a clear noun phrase such as 'a sense of excitement'. Suggestions: match verb number to the gerund subject and use lowercase unless proper noun; make noun phrases specific.

× I am of the opinion that bikes are very much popular in my country.

✓ I am of the opinion that bikes are very popular in my country.

The phrase 'very much popular' is unidiomatic in present tense; use 'very popular'. The rest of the sentence correctly uses present tense for a general opinion. Suggestions: use common collocations (e.g., 'very popular' rather than 'very much popular').

× People nowadays use a lot of bikes because they feel that it's convenient, it's eco friendly and it helps reach the destination quite quickly.

✓ People nowadays use bikes a lot because they feel that they are convenient, eco-friendly, and help them reach their destinations quickly.

Pronoun reference and agreement need correction: replace 'it's' (singular) with 'they are' to refer to plural 'bikes'. 'Use a lot of bikes' is better as 'use bikes a lot'. 'Helps reach the destination' lacks an explicit subject and object; use 'help them reach their destinations'. Also hyphenate 'eco-friendly' and pluralize 'destination' to match general meaning. Suggestions: ensure pronouns agree in number with their nouns, place adjectives correctly, and include explicit subjects/objects for clarity.