Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar and sentence structure: use past tense consistently and correct word order (e.g., “I had a bike,” “my parents gave me a bike”). Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words (for example, “when,” “because,” or “so”). Keep answers concise (no more than 4–5 sentences). Also avoid irrelevant comments (like stressing gender) unless it adds meaning.

例: I had a bike when I was a child. My parents gave it to me when I was eleven, and I used to ride it every afternoon after school. Because our house was near a park, I often practised cycling there, which helped me become confident on hills and busy streets.

提案: Make your opinion clear with a concise topic sentence, then support it with specific, well-linked reasons and avoid repetition. Use correct vocabulary and comparative phrases (e.g., “more popular than cars,” “especially in hilly areas”). Use linking words such as “because,” “for example,” or “therefore” to connect ideas and keep sentences grammatically correct.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are cheaper and more convenient than cars for many people. For example, in mountainous regions riders prefer bikes since they are easier to park and more fun to ride on winding roads. Therefore, many men and young people choose motorcycles or scooters for daily transport and leisure.

× Yes, I have a bike when I was a child.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child.

The sentence uses present tense 'have' with a past time expression 'when I was a child'. This is a tense mismatch. Use the past simple 'had' to match the past time reference. Suggestion: use past tense for actions or possession that occurred in the past.

× I like bikes to drive.

✓ I like riding bikes.

After 'like' when expressing enjoyment of an activity, use the gerund form 'riding' rather than the infinitive structure 'to drive' in this context. Also 'bikes' are ridden, so 'riding bikes' is natural.

× My parents give to me bike when I was 11 years old.

✓ My parents gave me a bike when I was 11 years old.

Multiple issues: 'give' should be past simple 'gave' to match the past time; the correct word order is 'gave me a bike' without 'to' and with the article 'a' before 'bike'. Use 'gave me a bike' to express that they gave the speaker a bike at age 11.

× I'm a girl but I have a good experience with bike.

✓ I'm a girl, but I have a lot of experience with bikes.

The phrase 'a good experience with bike' is unnatural. Use 'a lot of experience' or 'good experience' with the plural 'bikes' or include an article: 'with a bike'. Also adding a comma before 'but' improves clarity. 'Experience' is typically uncountable in this sense.

× Yes mostly bikes are probably in our country because the Mens and the boys mostly like to drive bikes rather than the cars because bikes are most best way to enjoy in hillies or mountains areas.

✓ Yes, bikes are quite common in our country because men and boys mostly prefer riding bikes rather than cars, since bikes are the best way to enjoy hilly or mountainous areas.

Several issues fixed: add comma after 'Yes'; remove unnecessary 'probably' duplication; use 'men' not 'Mens'; 'prefer riding bikes rather than cars' uses correct verb and article removal; 'the best' is the correct superlative form (not 'most best'); use 'hilly or mountainous areas' instead of 'hillies or mountains areas'; remove 'in' after 'enjoy'. Also overall sentence structure simplified for clarity.

× So that's why I think so bikes are popular in our country.

✓ So I think bikes are popular in our country.

The phrase 'So that's why I think so' is redundant and awkward. Use a concise conjunction: 'So' or 'Therefore, I think...' Also add a comma after 'So' and remove extra 'so' for natural phrasing.