Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clearer and more accurate. Start with a direct topic sentence answering the question, then give 1–2 specific supporting details using correct tenses and linking words. Correct mistakes: say “I had a bike” (past tense), clarify what you received (bike or bag), and explain briefly why it mattered. Keep to 2–4 sentences, avoid repetition and unclear phrases.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My parents bought it for me as a birthday present when I was in middle school, and I used it to ride to school and to exercise. Because my father chose it for me, the bike reminded me of our close relationship and made it special.

提案: Give a direct answer, then support it with specific reasons and examples, using linking words for coherence. Use correct grammar (plural/singular, articles) and clearer vocabulary. For example, say why bikes are popular (cost, convenience, traffic) and provide a brief comparison with cars. Limit to 2–4 sentences.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country. Many people prefer them because they are cheap to use, faster in heavy traffic, and easier to park. For short trips around town, bikes are more convenient than cars, especially in crowded cities.

× Sure, I have my first bag in my middle schools my father sent me as a birthday gift and from nowadays I use it when I go to my school or do some exercise. I think it's means the our relationship.

✓ Sure, I got my first bag in middle school; my father sent it to me as a birthday gift, and since then I have used it when I go to school or exercise. I think it represents our relationship.

Errors: incorrect tense choices and word forms. 'have my first bag' should be past simple 'got my first bag' because the event happened in the past. 'in my middle schools' is wrong; correct is 'in middle school' (singular, correct noun phrase). 'sent me' is okay but better as 'sent it to me' for clarity. 'from nowadays' is incorrect; use 'since then' to indicate time from past to present. 'I use it when I go to my school or do some exercise' should be present perfect 'I have used it' to show an action continuing to present; also 'go to school' without 'my'. 'I think it's means the our relationship' incorrect verb and article; correct 'I think it represents our relationship.' Suggestions: match verb tenses to time frames (use past simple for single past events, present perfect for past actions with present relevance), use standard time expressions (since then, nowadays), fix articles and pronouns ('it', 'our'), and simplify noun phrases ('middle school').

× Of course in my country many people use bike. You know bikes are the different ways and utilize you can use it when you go to a destination, it is faster and more convenient instead of buy some cars also.

✓ Of course, in my country many people use bikes. You know, there are different ways to use bikes: you can ride one to get to a destination; it is faster and more convenient than buying a car.

Errors: incorrect noun number and awkward sentence structure. 'use bike' should be 'use bikes' (plural) to match 'many people'. 'bikes are the different ways and utilize' is ungrammatical; better: 'there are different ways to use bikes'. 'you can use it when you go to a destination' should be 'you can ride one to get to a destination' for clarity and correct pronoun reference. 'instead of buy some cars also' mixes forms; use comparative structure 'more convenient than buying a car.' Suggestions: ensure subject-verb and noun number agreement, use clear connectors ('there are'), convert infinitives appropriately ('to use', 'buying'), and use standard comparisons ('more convenient than').