Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar (past tense), clarity and coherence. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, then add one or two brief supporting details using linking words. Use correct verbs (had, rode, learned), plural/singular forms, and simple connectors (first, then, because). Keep to a maximum of about 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. At first it was a tricycle with two wheels at the back, and I used it to learn balance. Later I moved to a two-wheeled bike and I fell several times before I could ride confidently.

提案: Make the answer more structured and use clearer vocabulary and grammar. Begin with a direct opinion, then add one or two specific reasons or examples using linking words (for example, because, so). Avoid colloquial phrases like 'wanna' in formal speaking and correct tense/word order.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in the area where I used to live. This is because they are inexpensive and convenient for short trips, for example, going to nearby shops or visiting friends. As a result, many people prefer cycling for daily errands.

× Yes I have a bike.

✓ Yes, I had a bike.

The question asks about possession in the past ('Did you have a bike when you were a child?'), so the verb should be in the past tense. Use 'had' instead of 'have' to match the time frame. Suggestion: Pay attention to time references in the question and match the verb tense accordingly.

× When I was a child I write many different kind of bike and 1st I was like a bike with the three wheel at the back and I fell so many times when I first ride it.

✓ When I was a child I rode many different kinds of bikes. First I had a bike with three wheels at the back and I fell many times when I first rode it.

Multiple tense and form issues: 'write' is incorrect; the past tense of 'ride' is 'rode', and 'ride' must be 'rode' for both occurrences because the events are in the past. 'Many different kind of bike' needs plural forms: 'many different kinds of bikes'. '1st' and informal wording should be written as 'First'. 'A bike with the three wheel' should be 'a bike with three wheels'. Suggestions: Use past tense verbs for past events, make nouns plural when counting ('kinds', 'bikes', 'wheels'), and use standard written words ('First') rather than numerals in speech transcripts.

× Yes bike very popular in my country where I live before because it's very easy to get around when you wanna go buy some some stuff at the shop that like they sell near your house.

✓ Yes, bikes were very popular in the area where I lived before because they were very easy to get around on when you wanted to buy some things at shops that sell items near your house.

Several issues: article and noun number ('Yes bike' -> 'Yes, bikes' plural); tense consistency ('where I live before' should be past 'where I lived before'); modal/colloquial forms ('wanna' -> 'wanted to'); repetition and informal 'some some stuff' -> 'some things'; preposition choice ('get around on' for bicycles) and relative clause clarity ('shops that sell items near your house'). Suggestions: Keep tense consistent with the time frame, use standard forms (wanted to), avoid repetition, use correct prepositions for modes of transport ('on a bike'), and pluralize general nouns ('bikes', 'shops', 'things').