Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your response clearer and more natural: start with a direct topic sentence, correct grammar and tense, avoid repetition, and add one specific supporting detail. Use linking words (e.g., "but", "so", "and") appropriately. Keep the answer to no more than four sentences.

例: I think I did have a bike when I was a child, although I can't remember all the details. I used to ride it to school most days, which made my commute faster and more fun. Because the route was short and safe, I often rode with my friends after class.

提案: Reduce hesitations and filler words, give a clear opinion, and support it with a specific reason or example. Use linking words (e.g., "however", "for example", "because") to connect ideas and keep it within three sentences.

例: Bicycles are moderately popular in my country; there are bike lanes in some cities, but they are not widely used. However, many university students ride bikes to campus because it is cheap and convenient. For example, I often see groups of students parking bikes near the main library.

× Actually I have no idea because I can't remember this memory but I listen think I remember.

✓ Actually I have no idea because I can't remember this memory but I less think I remember.

The original sentence uses 'listen' which is incorrect in this context (likely a mispronunciation). The main issue is tense/word choice: 'I have no idea' (present) and 'I can't remember' (present) are fine, but 'I listen think' is ungrammatical. Replace with 'I less think' is still odd; better correction would be 'I don't really think I remember' which keeps present tense and conveys uncertainty. Suggestion: use 'I don't really think I remember' to be natural and correct.

× Yes I have.

✓ Yes, I did.

The question asked 'Did you have a bike when you were a child?' which requires a past tense response. 'Yes I have' is present perfect and doesn't match the past simple question. Use 'Yes, I did' to match the past tense context.

× I have a bike when I was a child I usually my bike when I go to my school and I love my bike.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child. I usually rode my bike when I went to school, and I loved my bike.

Multiple sentence structure and tense errors: 'I have a bike when I was a child' mixes present and past; change to past 'I had a bike when I was a child.' 'I usually my bike when I go to my school' is missing a verb and uses present tense; add the past verb 'rode' and past 'went'. 'I love my bike' should be past 'I loved my bike' to keep consistency. Break into three sentences for clarity.

× Actually, umm, in my country there are bicycle lanes, but they aren't used much.

✓ Actually, in my country there are bicycle lanes, but they aren't used much.

This sentence is mostly correct. The only issue was filler words 'umm' which are not grammar errors but should be removed for clarity. The 'there are' structure is appropriate.

× Uh, I see MMM, many universities, uh, students, uh, they use, uh, usually umm goes their campus and I love this.

✓ I see many university students usually go to their campus by bike, and I like that.

The original has disfluent fillers and incorrect verb forms: 'they use, usually goes their campus' is ungrammatical. Use 'students usually go to their campus' (present simple for habitual action). 'I love this' is acceptable but 'I like that' is more natural. Remove fillers and correct subject-verb agreement and verb choice.