Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve clarity and naturalness by using a concise topic sentence, correct tense and articles, and limit redundancy. Use linking words to connect reasons briefly and specify one or two supporting details. Aim for 2–4 sentences and correct small grammar errors (e.g., ‘a road bike’, ‘I hesitated for a long time’).

例: Yes, I did. I owned a new road bike as a child, and it was very fast. However, I hesitated for a long time before buying it because it was quite expensive at that time.

提案: Make the answer more coherent and specific: start with a clear topic sentence, then give 1–2 specific reasons using linking words. Correct grammar (e.g., ‘most people’, ‘city centers’, ‘better than cars in congested areas’). Avoid filler words like ‘umm’ and finish with a concise closing. Provide a specific example or statistic if possible.

例: Yes, I think bikes are very popular in Korea. In big city centers, traffic congestion makes cycling faster and more convenient than driving, so many people use shared bikes. For example, in Seoul you can often see crowded bike stations near subway exits.

× Yes, I had.

✓ Yes, I did.

The question is in the past tense: 'Did you have a bike...' The short affirmative response to a did-question uses the auxiliary 'did' rather than repeating the main verb 'had.' Use 'Yes, I did.' to be grammatically correct.

× When I was a child, I had a new bike and that type was road bike, so it was really fast, but the price was quite expensive at the time, so when I bought it I hesitated a lot of time.

✓ When I was a child, I had a new bike; it was a road bike, so it was really fast. However, it was quite expensive at the time, so I hesitated for a long time before buying it.

This sentence has multiple structure and word choice issues. 'That type was road bike' is unnatural — use 'it was a road bike.' Use punctuation to separate ideas (semicolon or sentences). 'Hesitated a lot of time' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'hesitated for a long time' or 'hesitated a lot.' Also 'when I bought it I hesitated' has wrong time sequence; you hesitate before buying, so 'I hesitated for a long time before buying it.' These changes fix word order and clarity.

× In my opinion the bikes are really popular in Korea umm this is because most of people who live in city center or big city the traffic is not good as much as bike.

✓ In my opinion, bikes are really popular in Korea. This is because most people who live in city centers or big cities find traffic worse than cycling.

Article and quantifier use is incorrect: 'most of people' should be 'most people.' 'City center' and 'big city' need plural forms when speaking generally: 'city centers' and 'big cities.' Also the comparative phrase 'the traffic is not good as much as bike' is incorrect; use a clearer comparison such as 'find traffic worse than cycling' or 'traffic is worse than traveling by bike.' Adding a period and separating clauses improves clarity.

× So a lot of people usually use shared bike.

✓ So a lot of people usually use shared bikes.

The noun should be plural after 'a lot of people' because it refers to many people using multiple bikes: 'shared bikes.' Alternatively, 'shared bike services' or 'shared bicycles' would also be correct.

× So it is really.

✓ So they are very popular.

'So it is really.' is incomplete and unclear. 'It' ambiguously refers to 'bikes' (plural), so use 'they.' Also complete the idea: 'they are very popular' clarifies what 'really' was meant to modify.