Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and focused: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details (e.g., who gave it to you, how you used it). Avoid filler words like 'actually' and 'obviously'. Use a linking phrase if you add extra information.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child and I still own a newer model now. My parents bought my first bike for my seventh birthday, and I used it every day to ride to school and to visit friends.

提案: Make the answer slightly more structured: give a clear topic sentence, one or two specific reasons, and a short example or comparison. Use linking words (e.g., 'because', 'for example', 'however') and replace vague phrases like 'a lot of people' with more precise language.

例: Yes, bikes are fairly popular in my country, although it varies by region. For example, in urban areas many people cycle because it is environmentally friendly and much cheaper than driving, especially with high petrol prices; however, rural areas rely more on cars due to longer distances.

× Yes, I actually did have a bike when I was a child and I still have it. Obviously not my old bike, but yeah, I had.

✓ Yes, I actually did have a bike when I was a child, and I still have a bike now. Obviously it is not my old bike, but yes, I did.

The original contains informal fragments and unclear pronoun reference ('but yeah, I had' is a fragment). Change to complete sentences and clarify the referent of 'it' to 'a bike'. Use 'did' for emphasis in past ('I did have') and 'I did' to confirm; replace 'yeah' with 'yes' for formality and clarity. Ensure each clause has a verb and clear object. Problem type identified as 'Verb in the present participle form' because the sentence structure errors create missing or awkward verb forms; however the core issues are sentence fragments and unclear pronoun reference which relate to sentence structure and verb usage. Suggestion: write full sentences, keep tense consistent, and explicitly name the noun when meaning changes.

× I think it mainly depends on the area that you are talking about, but generally I think a lot of people use bikes since it is more environmentally friendly and also it's cheaper than going with the car and paying for the high-priced gas.

✓ I think it mainly depends on the area you are talking about, but generally a lot of people use bikes because it is more environmentally friendly and cheaper than driving a car and paying for expensive gas.

Problems corrected: remove unnecessary 'that' after 'area' (common English omits it), replace 'since' with 'because' for clearer causal connection, change 'going with the car' to 'driving a car' (incorrect preposition and verb collocation), replace 'high-priced gas' with 'expensive gas' (more natural adjective choice). Also remove duplicate 'I think'. These are preposition and collocation errors and word choice issues. Suggestion: prefer 'driving a car' and 'because' for causal reasons; avoid redundant phrases.