Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve fluency, accuracy and coherence. Remove fragments and correct word choice (e.g., “write” → “ride”) and contractions; combine ideas into 2–3 clear sentences using linking words. Add one specific detail (age or a memory) and avoid repetition. Keep answers under five sentences.

例: Yes. I had a small blue bike with training wheels when I was about six, and my father taught me how to ride it, which made me feel very proud. After he removed the training wheels I practiced every weekend and often rode to the park near our house to play with my friends.

提案: Good content and coherence but improve vocabulary precision and linking. Replace vague phrases (“themes”) with correct terms (“schemes” or “programs”), use a wider range of linking words (e.g., “however,” “for instance”), and provide one concrete statistic or clearer comparison to strengthen the answer. Keep it within three sentences for concision.

例: Yes, bikes are still quite popular, especially in smaller towns and around universities because they are inexpensive and convenient for short trips. For instance, many students cycle to campus daily and several cities have introduced bike-sharing programs to encourage this. However, in large cities people often prefer cars or the metro due to longer distances and heavy traffic.

× It was.

✓ It was small and blue.

The sentence 'It was.' is a sentence fragment lacking a complement that describes what 'it' was. This is a sentence structure error (ID 26). To be complete and clear, add the adjective phrase that was intended (small and blue) so the sentence becomes a full clause with subject and predicate.

× It had training wheels at 1st and my father taught me to write it so I felt proud.

✓ It had training wheels at first and my father taught me to ride it, so I felt proud.

Two issues flagged by the allowed list: '1st' is an incorrect written form for 'first' (preposition/word choice) and 'write' is an incorrect verb; the correct verb is 'ride'. This falls under incorrect use of prepositions/word choice (ID 11) and sentence structure. Replace '1st' with 'first' and 'write' with 'ride'. Also add a comma before 'so' to join the clauses correctly.

× many students ride to campus every day and some cities now have bike sharing themes.

✓ many students ride to campus every day and some cities now have bike-sharing schemes.

The phrase 'bike sharing themes' is incorrect word choice and collocation. The intended meaning is systems or schemes for sharing bikes. This is a sentence structure/word choice issue (ID 26). Replace with 'bike-sharing schemes' (or 'bike-sharing programs') to use the correct collocation and hyphenation.

× But in big cities people often prefer cars or the metro because of distance and traffic.

✓ But in big cities, people often prefer cars or the metro because of long distances and traffic.

The original is understandable but slightly ungrammatical: 'because of distance' is vague; idiomatic English uses 'because of long distances' or 'because of the distance and traffic.' Adding a comma after the introductory 'But in big cities' improves flow. This is a sentence structure/style issue (ID 26).