Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar, fluency and coherence. Start with a clear topic sentence, use correct verb forms and avoid hesitations. Keep it within 2–4 concise sentences. Add one specific supporting detail (when or why you stopped riding). Use linking words like “but” and “however” correctly.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I used to ride it to visit friends and to play in the park, but I no longer ride because I moved to a city where I use public transport. However, I still enjoy remembering those rides from my childhood.

提案: Make the response more natural and specific. Start with a direct opinion sentence, then give a clear reason and an example. Use correct noun forms and smoother linking phrases (e.g., “because,” “for example,” “many”). Keep sentences short and avoid repetition.

例: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in my country because many children and students use them to commute to elementary and high schools. For example, I often see groups of students cycling to school in the morning, which shows bikes are a common and practical choice.

× Yes, I. Has had a bike an umm, child. But now I can't ride a bike. But when I was young I can ride a bike.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child, but now I can't ride one. When I was young, I could ride a bike.

Original sentences contain sentence fragments, wrong verb forms, and inconsistent tense/modal use. 'Yes, I.' and 'Has had a bike an umm, child.' are fragmented and ungrammatical; combine into 'Yes, I had a bike when I was a child.' The present inability uses 'can't' correctly, but the past ability should use 'could' (past modal) not 'can'. Also replace repeated 'a bike' with 'one' for naturalness. Use commas to separate clauses.

× I think so 'cause I I have seen the child or students are riding bike for their go to high schools or elementary schools.

✓ I think so because I have seen children and students riding bikes to their high schools or elementary schools.

Issues: 'cause' informal contraction best expanded to 'because' in formal responses. 'I I' is a repetition error. 'the child or students' is wrong; use plural 'children and students'. 'are riding bike' needs plural noun 'bikes' or gerund phrase 'riding bikes'. 'for their go to' is ungrammatical; use 'to their' to indicate destination. Also maintain present perfect 'have seen' which is appropriate for observed general behavior.