Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Melhore a clareza e a coerência: responda diretamente à pergunta com uma frase-tópico e use detalhes relevantes e corretos. Evite hesitações (“uh”) e erros gramaticais (por exemplo, “didn't know how to write the bike” está incorreto). Use linking words curtos se for necessário explicar por que deu a bicicleta. Mantenha-se dentro de 3–4 frases naturais.

例: Yes, I did. I had a small bicycle when I was a child, but I later gave it to a neighbor's child because I had outgrown it. I felt happy about that because the child used it every day and it was useful for them.

提案: Seja mais preciso e organize a resposta: comece com uma afirmação clara, depois dê razões específicas e evite repetições e hesitações. Corrija a expressão sobre imigrantes ("Vietnam Vietnamese" e "can't take a car ride license" são confusos). Use conectores simples como "because", "for example" ou "also".

例: Yes, I think bikes are very popular in Japan. For example, many people use bicycles for short trips and commuting because parking and public transport can be inconvenient. Also, some foreign workers prefer bikes since getting a driving license is difficult and expensive for them.

× Yes, I had uh, I didn't know how to write the bike, so I gave the bike to a, a child that usually lives near my house and I think that the child are very happy right now, so it's a good thing.

✓ Yes, I had one. I didn't know how to ride the bike, so I gave it to a child who usually lived near my house, and I think that the child is very happy now, so it was a good thing.

Several past tense and related errors: 'write the bike' is incorrect verb choice — should be 'ride' (use of correct verb). The clause refers to a past situation, so relative clause and main verbs should be in past tense: 'who usually lived' and 'it was a good thing.' 'Child are' is subject-verb agreement; singular 'child' requires 'is.' Also change 'right now' to 'now' or 'then' depending on intended meaning; here 'now' is acceptable if referring to present happiness. Suggestions: use appropriate verbs (ride vs write), keep consistent past tense for past events, match singular subjects with singular verbs, and simplify pronouns (use 'one' and 'it').

× Yes, I do, because I live in Japan. Here in Japan, there are a lot of Vietnam Vietnamese people and they can't take, uh, a car ride, a car ride license, so they usually only ride bikes.

✓ Yes, I do, because I live in Japan. Here in Japan, there are a lot of Vietnamese people and they can't get a driver's license, so they usually ride bikes.

Issues: 'Vietnam Vietnamese' is redundant and incorrectly formed — use 'Vietnamese people.' 'They can't take a car ride, a car ride license' is incorrect collocation and word choice; the correct expression is 'get a driver's license' or 'obtain a driving license.' 'Usually only ride bikes' is awkward — prefer 'usually ride bikes.' Suggestions: remove redundancy, use correct adjective form 'Vietnamese,' use idiomatic verb phrases like 'get a driver's license,' and avoid unnecessary words like 'only' when it disrupts natural word order.