Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar and fluency, reduce hesitations and redundancy, and make the sequence and reasons clearer. Use a clear topic sentence, then one or two concise supporting details with linking words. Correct articles and verb forms (e.g., "when I was a child", "when I was about 13"). Avoid repeating phrases like "it really, it really" and filler sounds such as "uh".

例: No, I didn't have a bike when I was a child. However, when I was about 13 I bought a bicycle to commute to school, because the roads could be slippery in the rain and public transport was unreliable. As a result, I could arrive on time even during bad weather.

提案: Work on accuracy of word choice and sentence structure, avoid vague or contradictory words ("overrated" is wrong here), and use linking words to contrast or compare. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., "popular" or "widely used"), correct comparative forms ("easier" not "more easier"), and smoother connectors ("because", "so"). Provide a specific reason or example to support the opinion.

例: Yes, I think bikes are very popular in India. They are widely used because they are affordable and help riders avoid traffic. For example, many students and delivery workers prefer motorcycles or scooters since they are faster and cheaper than cars in busy cities.

× I didn't have a bike when I was child.

✓ I didn't have a bike when I was a child.

Missing the article 'a' before 'child'. The sentence is in past tense and refers to a single noun; English requires an article with singular countable nouns. Add 'a' to make it grammatically correct.

× Later, when I was about 13 years, I bought a bicycle to commute to school, especially on rainy days when roads were slippery.

✓ Later, when I was about 13 years old, I bought a bicycle to commute to school, especially on rainy days when the roads were slippery.

Omission of 'old' after ages and missing definite article 'the' before 'roads'. Use '13 years old' to express age and 'the roads' to refer to specific roads; tense (past) is correct but these omissions are grammatical errors.

× It really, it really helped me to, uh, get to class on time despite the heavy rain.

✓ It really helped me get to class on time despite the heavy rain.

Redundant repetition 'It really, it really' and filler 'uh' make the sentence disfluent. Also, English prefers 'helped me get' (bare infinitive) rather than 'helped me to get'; both are acceptable but bare infinitive is more natural here. Remove repetition and filler for clarity.

× Yes I do.

✓ Yes, I do.

Missing comma after introductory 'Yes'. While minor, punctuation affects sentence flow. Tense is present and correct; add comma for correctness.

× Bikes have been popularised and overrated anywhere around India because it makes our travel much more easier and convenient rather than uh, traveling in car.

✓ Bikes have become very popular all over India because they make travel much easier and more convenient than traveling by car.

Multiple issues: 'popularised and overrated' is awkward and likely incorrect word choice; 'have become very popular' is clearer. Subject-verb agreement: 'it makes' should be 'they make' to match plural 'bikes'. 'Much more easier' is incorrect—use 'much easier' or 'far easier'; 'rather than traveling in car' is wrong preposition and article—use 'than traveling by car' or 'than using a car'. Also replace 'anywhere around India' with 'all over India' for naturalness.

× So by that way it is more helpful for travelers.

✓ So in that way it is more helpful for travelers.

Preposition choice: 'by that way' is incorrect. Use 'in that way' or 'that way' to express manner. The rest is acceptable, though 'it is' refers to bikes and is grammatically consistent.