Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cần chỉnh ngữ pháp và trật tự từ để câu tự nhiên hơn, dùng thì quá khứ hoàn chỉnh cho hành động trong quá khứ và tránh từ thừa. Hơn nữa nên thêm một câu hỗ trợ ngắn gọn (lý do hoặc kỉ niệm) để làm phong phú câu trả lời, nhưng không quá 3-4 câu. Ví dụ: nói rõ bạn chơi với chiếc xe như thế nào hoặc vì sao bạn nhớ nó.

例: Yes. I had a small red bicycle when I was a child. My parents gave it to me for my sixth birthday, and I used to ride it every afternoon around the neighborhood with my friend Trinity. I remember feeling very proud when I learned to ride without training wheels.

提案: Cần cải thiện ngữ pháp, trật tự câu và dùng từ chính xác để diễn đạt ý. Tránh câu dài lộn xộn; hãy mở đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng, sau đó thêm 1-2 câu chi tiết với từ nối hợp lý (e.g., "because", "for example"). Sử dụng từ vựng phù hợp (e.g., "popular", "commute", "many people").

例: Yes, I think bicycles are still very popular in Vietnam. Many people use them to commute to work or school because they are cheap and convenient. For example, in cities you can see students and vendors riding bikes every day, even though more people are buying motorbikes and cars now.

× Yes, I have a small red bicycle with Trinity when I was child and my parents gave it to me for my 6th birthday.

✓ Yes, I had a small red bicycle called Trinity when I was a child, and my parents gave it to me for my 6th birthday.

The sentence mixes present tense 'have' with past time reference 'when I was a child'; use past tense 'had'. Missing article before 'child' and unclear use of 'with Trinity'—likely the bicycle's name, so use 'called Trinity'. Also add a comma and 'a' before 'child' to be grammatically correct. Suggestion: maintain past tense for events in childhood and include articles and clear noun phrases.

× Yes, of course, because you know, Vietnam is one of the most country in the world, have a healthy lifestyle and every people in here ride by to work or to go to school and ask me, I am car people very like writing people writing bicycle too.

✓ Yes, of course. Vietnam is one of the healthiest countries in the world; people there have a healthy lifestyle. Many people ride bikes to work or to school. As for me, I like cars, but I also enjoy riding a bicycle.

This original sentence has multiple structural problems: incorrect comparative expression 'one of the most country' should be 'one of the most X countries' or 'one of the healthiest countries'; verb and subject order 'have a healthy lifestyle' needs a subject 'people there have'; 'every people in here' is incorrect—use 'many people' or 'people here'; 'ride by to work' should be 'ride bikes to work'; 'ask me' is unclear and ungrammatical; 'I am car people very like writing people writing bicycle too' is ungrammatical—intended meaning likely 'I like cars but also like riding bicycles'. Suggestions: split into separate sentences, ensure subject-verb agreement, use correct noun forms ('countries', 'people'), and use correct verb phrases ('ride bikes', 'enjoy riding a bicycle').