Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more direct and coherent: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct grammar (tense and possessive) and remove unnecessary phrases. Keep it under five sentences.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. It was a gift from my grandmother, and I would usually ride it whenever I visited her house. Because her home was near a quiet park, I felt safe practicing there and became quite confident riding on my own.

提案: Give a clear opinion with specific reasons and use correct grammar. Use linking words (for example, because, however) and avoid vague or repetitive phrases. Provide one concrete example or comparison to support your view.

例: I don't think bikes are very popular in my country because public transport is extensive and modern. For example, many people prefer taking fast trains and buses, so they rarely use bicycles for commuting. However, bikes are becoming more common in some cities for short trips and leisure.

× Yes, I had a bike when I was small, it's just it was a gift for my grandma and I usually ride my bike when I visit my grandma.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was small; it was a gift from my grandma, and I usually rode my bike when I visited her.

This sentence mixes past and present tenses incorrectly. The main idea refers to past events, so verbs should be in the past tense: 'it's just it was a gift for my grandma' has an unnecessary present 'it's' and awkward phrasing; change to 'it was a gift from my grandma.' Also, 'I usually ride my bike when I visit my grandma' refers to habitual past visits, so use past tense 'usually rode' and 'visited.' Use semicolon or conjunction to join clauses and replace 'for my grandma' with the correct preposition 'from.' Suggestion: keep tense consistent by placing all actions in the past when describing childhood and past visits.

× No, I think bike are not popular in my country because the transportation of my country is very popular and it is state of state in the art transportation.

✓ No, I think bikes are not popular in my country because the public transportation in my country is very popular and it is state-of-the-art.

The noun 'bike' should be plural as a general reference to the category, so use 'bikes are.' Also, the phrase 'the transportation of my country' is awkward; use 'public transportation in my country.' 'State of state in the art transportation' is incorrect and redundant; the correct adjective is 'state-of-the-art.' Remove the repeated words and use hyphens for the compound adjective. Maintain consistent noun forms and use natural collocations.