Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Focus on grammar, clarity and coherence. Start with a clear topic sentence, use correct past tense, and connect supporting details with linking words. Also correct pronoun use and unclear phrases (e.g., “she touched me”, “in my grocery”). Keep answers natural and concise (no more than 4–5 sentences).

例: Yes, I had a bicycle when I was a child. My grandfather bought it for me, and he taught me how to ride it. I practiced every afternoon near our house until I felt confident. Riding that bike was one of my favorite activities as a child.

提案: Improve accuracy and fluency by using correct verbs and clearer linking phrases. Begin with a direct topic sentence, then give specific reasons or examples and use linking words like “because” or “for example.” Avoid repetition (e.g., “to commuter to commuting”).

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country, especially in cities. For example, many people cycle to work because it is cheap and faster than sitting in traffic. In addition, bicycles are common for short trips to the market or school.

× Yes, in my childhood I have a bicycle.

✓ Yes, in my childhood I had a bicycle.

The speaker refers to a past time ('in my childhood'), so the verb should be in the past tense. Use 'had' instead of 'have'. Suggestion: Use past simple for actions or states that occurred in the past (e.g., 'I had a bicycle').

× It's bought by my grandpa.

✓ It was bought by my grandpa.

The original uses present tense 'is' with a past participle 'bought', which creates an incorrect passive for a past event. For a past action, use 'was' + past participle. Suggestion: Use past passive 'was bought' to describe something purchased in the past.

× She touched me.

✓ He bought it for me.

The sentence 'She touched me' is incorrect and unclear in context. The speaker likely means the grandfather gave or bought the bicycle for them. Also the pronoun for grandpa should be 'he'. Replace with a clearer verb and correct pronouns: 'He bought it for me.' Suggestion: Ensure pronouns match the noun's gender and choose verbs that reflect the intended action.

× She teaches me how to ride the bike.

✓ He taught me how to ride the bike.

The original mixes present tense 'teaches' with past context. 'Grandpa' is male, so use 'he', and the teaching happened in the past, so use past simple 'taught'. Suggestion: Match pronouns to referents and use past tense for past events.

× And in my grocery I knew how to ride a bike.

✓ And by the time I started school I already knew how to ride a bike.

The phrase 'in my grocery' is incorrect and unclear. The verb 'knew' is past tense, but the time expression is wrong. Provide a clear time expression for when the skill was acquired. Suggestion: Use appropriate time phrases (e.g., 'by the time I started school') and keep past tense for past abilities.

× Yes, sure, many people drive bike to commuter to commuting and it's a very popular vehicle for people in my country.

✓ Yes, sure, many people ride bikes to commute, and they are very popular in my country.

Multiple issues: 'drive bike' is incorrect collocation (use 'ride bikes'), 'to commuter to commuting' is incorrect — use the infinitive 'to commute', and subject-verb agreement and quantifier: 'they are very popular' refers to 'bikes'. Also plural 'bikes' fits 'many people'. Suggestion: Use correct collocations ('ride bikes'), correct infinitive ('to commute'), and ensure pronoun and verb agree with the plural noun ('they are').