Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more fluent and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail. Avoid hesitations (uh) and redundant phrasing. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, because or so).

例: No, I didn't have a bike as a child because my family couldn't afford one. However, I often walked to school and sometimes shared a neighbour's bike, which helped me gain independence and confidence.

提案: Give a direct opinion first, then support it with one or two clear reasons and a brief comparison. Remove filler words and repeat phrases; use linking words like however, now, or because to make your point coherent.

例: I don't think bikes are very popular in my country now. Instead, most people prefer motorbikes because they are faster and more convenient for long distances, whereas bicycles are mainly used for exercise or short trips.

× Uh, actually in the past I didn't have a bike because of, uh, my family's poor conditions at that time.

✓ Uh, actually, in the past I didn't have a bike because my family was poor at that time.

The original sentence uses the awkward phrase 'because of my family's poor conditions at that time.' This is grammatically acceptable but unnatural. Changing to 'because my family was poor at that time' uses a clear past-tense verb and a natural expression. Also added a comma after 'actually' for clarity. Suggestion: use simple past ('was') to describe past states and prefer natural collocations like 'my family was poor' rather than 'poor conditions.'

× Uh, I think that's just that's matters when in when it is in the past, but uh, for now, there are not many people uh, using bike anyway anymore.

✓ Uh, I think that only mattered in the past, but now not many people use bikes anymore.

Multiple problems: incorrect tense and awkward phrasing. 'That's matters when in when it is in the past' mixes present and past and is ungrammatical. The corrected sentence uses simple past 'mattered' to refer to past relevance and simple present 'use' to describe current habits. Also changed 'using bike' to 'use bikes' to match plural and usual collocation. Suggestion: keep past reference in past tense and present habits in present simple; use natural subject-verb forms and plural 'bikes.'

× They often use the motorbike.

✓ They often use motorbikes.

'The motorbike' implies a specific motorcycle; general statement about people should use the plural 'motorbikes' or 'motorcycles' without 'the.' Also 'motorbikes' is the usual plural form for a general habit. Suggestion: when speaking about general habits, use plural nouns without 'the' (for countable items).