Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: give one clear topic sentence, then add a specific detail or brief example. Avoid filler phrases like 'like' and 'as far as I can remember.' Use linking words if you add a second sentence.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. In fact, my parents bought me two different bikes as I grew older — one when I first learned to ride and a sturdier one a few years later for longer rides.

提案: Begin with a direct opinion, then support it with specific reasons and a linking word. Correct grammar (e.g., 'one of the easiest,' 'environmentally friendly') and avoid hesitations like 'uh.' Keep it to two or three concise sentences.

例: Definitely — bikes are very popular in my country. They are one of the easiest and most convenient ways to get around, and moreover they are environmentally friendly and cheap to maintain.

× My mom and dad bought me a bike like twice in my childhood as far as I can remember.

✓ My mom and dad bought me a bike about twice during my childhood, as far as I can remember.

The original sentence uses 'like' informally and has awkward time expression 'in my childhood'; replace 'like' with 'about' and use 'during my childhood' to fit standard past tense narrative. The comma before the clause 'as far as I can remember' improves clarity. Suggestions: use 'about' for approximate quantities and 'during my childhood' for a natural time phrase.

× Definitely, it is very popular in our country.

✓ Definitely, they are very popular in our country.

The student refers to 'bikes' (plural) in the question, but used the singular pronoun 'it' and singular verb 'is'. Change to plural pronoun 'they' and plural verb 'are' to agree with the plural subject. Ensure pronoun agrees with the noun it replaces.

× Bikes are one of the most easiest and convenient way of uh, transportation, and it is also environmental friendly.

✓ Bikes are one of the easiest and most convenient ways of transportation, and they are also environmentally friendly.

Multiple issues: 'one of the most easiest' is incorrect because 'easiest' already is a superlative; use either 'one of the easiest' or 'the easiest' and place 'most' only when needed. 'Convenient' modifies 'ways' so use 'most convenient' or 'more convenient'; better to say 'most convenient'. 'Way' must be plural 'ways' to match 'one of the ... ways'. 'It is' should be plural 'they are' to match 'bikes'. 'Environmental friendly' is incorrect word order and form; use the adverbial form 'environmentally' to modify 'friendly'. Also remove filler 'uh'. Suggestions: use correct superlative forms, ensure noun plurality matches 'one of the ...' structure, maintain pronoun-antecedent agreement, and use adverb 'environmentally' before 'friendly'.