Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Clarify meaning and correct word choice, use a clear topic sentence and 1–2 specific supporting details, and avoid redundancy. For example, replace incorrect verbs and vague phrases ("writing it", "boring neighborhood", "feel fear and active") with accurate descriptions. Use a linking phrase if you add a reason or example.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I enjoyed riding it around my neighborhood after school because it gave me a sense of freedom and excitement. For instance, I often rode to the park with my friends on weekends.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence answering the question, then support it with 1–2 clear, specific reasons using appropriate vocabulary and linking words. Remove hesitations and correct grammar (e.g., "I live in Bangkok", "there are few bike lanes").

例: I don't think bikes are very popular in my country, especially in Bangkok. The main reasons are heavy traffic and a lack of safe bike lanes, so many people prefer motorcycles or cars instead.

× I had a bike when I was a child. I loved writing it, often as boring neighborhood because it made me feel fear and active.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child. I loved riding it, often around my boring neighborhood because it made me feel free and active.

The student wrote 'writing' instead of 'riding' which is a wrong verb (word choice) and not a past tense form error but it leads to wrong meaning; however the main issues fit past tense/context. 'Writing' should be 'riding' (verb choice). 'as boring neighborhood' is incorrect preposition and article use; change to 'around my boring neighborhood'. 'fear' is incorrect word for intended meaning; 'free' fits the context. Ensure verbs agree with past narrative by keeping past tense 'loved' and 'made'. Suggestion: use correct verb 'ride' and correct preposition 'around', include possessive 'my', and choose the correct adjective 'free'.

× Umm, I would say that not quite popular because in Bangkok, like I'll now living in Bangkok, umm, people don't really use bike because that is not like they're very lesser parts for bike. So it's it's hard.

✓ Umm, I would say they are not very popular because here in Bangkok, where I now live, people don't really use bikes because there are not many bike lanes. So it's difficult.

Multiple tense and grammar problems: 'not quite popular' lacks a subject and auxiliary; correct to 'they are not very popular' (present tense and subject-verb agreement). 'I'll now living in Bangkok' mixes future 'I'll' with present participle; correct to 'I now live' or 'where I now live'. 'don't really use bike' needs plural 'bikes'. 'that is not like they're very lesser parts for bike' contains incorrect pronouns, comparative wording and preposition; intended meaning is 'there are not many bike lanes' — this uses 'there are' (there be issue) and plural noun 'lanes'. Final sentence 'So it's it's hard.' is informal and repetitive; change to 'So it's difficult.' Overall suggestions: keep present simple for general facts, ensure subject-verb agreement, use correct noun forms (bikes, lanes), and use clear structures like 'there are' to state existence.