Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more direct and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two brief supporting details (reason or consequence). Avoid unnecessary words like “I remember.” Keep it to under five sentences and use a linking word if you add details.

例: No, I didn't have a bike when I was a child. My family couldn't afford one, so I usually walked to school or played with friends at home.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence about popularity, then add specific supporting details using linking words (for example, because, so, therefore). Be concise and avoid repetition like repeating “especially” twice. Include a specific example or statistic if possible.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because the climate is mild and cities are compact. For example, many people cycle to work or school in summer, and local parks are full of cyclists on weekends.

× When I was a child, I remember I did not have any bike.

✓ When I was a child, I remember that I did not have a bike.

Use of 'any' with a singular countable noun is incorrect. 'Bike' is a countable noun and in negative sentences we should use the singular with an article or the plural. Also adding 'that' after 'remember' is natural. Suggestion: use 'a bike' or 'any bikes' depending on meaning.

× I believe bikes are quite a thing in our country especially with the weather.

✓ I believe bikes are quite popular in our country, especially because of the weather.

The phrase 'a thing' is informal and ambiguous; 'popular' is more appropriate. 'With the weather' is an incorrect prepositional choice to express cause; use 'because of' or 'due to' to show reason.

× Most of the time, especially during summer, it is sunny.

✓ Most of the time, especially during the summer, it is sunny.

This sentence is mostly fine but needs the definite article 'the' before 'summer' to refer to the season generally. This is an article usage issue (ID 22), but minimal; correction uses 'the summer'.

× Hence many people around the neighborhood are using bike to roam around the streets.

✓ Hence many people around the neighborhood are using bikes to ride around the streets.

'People' is plural so the countable noun should be plural: 'bikes' not 'bike'. Also 'using bike to roam' is awkward; use 'using bikes to ride' for natural collocation. 'Ride' is more appropriate than 'roam' with vehicles.

× They usually use it as their hobby or as form of entertainment.

✓ They usually use them as a hobby or as a form of entertainment.

Pronoun 'it' is incorrect when referring back to plural 'bikes'; use 'them'. Also 'as form of entertainment' needs the article 'a'. Finally, 'hobby' should be preceded by 'a' when singular: 'a hobby'.