Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Sửa ngữ pháp cơ bản và dùng thì phù hợp; trả lời trực tiếp, mạch lạc và ngắn gọn hơn. Cụ thể: (1) Dùng quá khứ cho hành động đã xảy ra (I had, I inherited, I rode, I gave), (2) Giữ tối đa 3–4 câu, mỗi câu rõ ràng một ý (sở hữu, thời gian sử dụng, hành động tiếp theo), (3) Tránh tiếng lấp và từ thừa (uh), (4) Dùng liên từ phù hợp (then, after that) để nối ý. Ví dụ sửa từng phần: “I had a bike that I inherited from my sister. I rode it for about a year. After that I gave it to my cousin and later bought a motorbike.”

例: I had a bike that I inherited from my sister. I rode it for about a year before giving it to my cousin. After that, I bought a motorbike.

提案: Cải thiện từ vựng và diễn đạt chính xác; trả lời trực tiếp với câu chủ đề rồi bổ sung chi tiết cụ thể. Cụ thể: (1) Dùng danh từ số nhiều và từ phù hợp (bikes, common/familiar), tránh từ sai nghĩa (không dùng “medical”), (2) Sử dụng thì hiện tại đơn cho thói quen (are popular, start), (3) Thêm số liệu hoặc ví dụ cụ thể nếu có (children learn to ride at 6–7), (4) Dùng liên từ (because, before) để kết nối ý. Ví dụ sửa: “Yes, bikes are very common in my country because many people learn to ride a bike before they get a motorbike or car.”

例: Yes, bikes are very common in my country because many people learn to ride a bike as children before they switch to a motorbike or car. For example, most kids start learning around six or seven years old.

× I do have a bike when I was a child, uh, I inherit it from my sister.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child; I inherited it from my sister.

The sentence mixes present tense 'do have' with past time 'when I was a child'. Use past simple 'had' for possession in the past and past simple 'inherited' as the action happened in the past. Suggestion: keep verbs consistent in past narrative: 'I had' and 'I inherited'.

× I ride the bike for one years and then I uh, give it to my cousin and then I buy a motorbike.

✓ I rode the bike for one year, then I gave it to my cousin and then I bought a motorbike.

The speaker is telling a past sequence of events, so all verbs should be in past simple: 'rode', 'gave', 'bought'. Also 'one years' is incorrect plural; use 'one year'. Suggestion: use past simple for completed past actions and correct singular 'year'.

× Yeah, bike is a like very familiar, uh, medical in my country.

✓ Yeah, bikes are a very common means of transport in my country.

The original uses singular 'bike is' but refers generally so plural 'bikes are' is appropriate (general statements). The word 'medical' is incorrect choice; use 'common' or 'familiar' and 'means of transport' to express usage. Suggestion: use plural for general facts and choose appropriate nouns.

× Uh, most of the, most of uh, the people in my country start from riding a bike before they came to motorbike or even a car.

✓ Most people in my country start by riding a bike before they move on to a motorbike or even a car.

The original has redundancy 'most of the, most of uh, the people' and mixes tenses: 'start' (present) with 'came' (past). For a general habit use present simple 'start by' and 'move on to'. Also 'came to motorbike' is incorrect collocation; use 'move on to a motorbike'. Suggestion: remove redundancy, keep present tense for general habits, and use correct verbs/collocations.