Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 답변이 직접적이고 이해는 되지만 문법(시제 혼동), 중복 표현, 연결어 사용 부족, 구체성 부족을 개선하세요. 예를 들어 과거 시제 일관적으로 사용하고 문장을 간결히 정리하며, 왜 재미있었는지 한두 가지 구체적 이유(친구, 장소, 활동)를 덧붙이세요. 또한 연결어(so, because, and then)를 사용해 문장 흐름을 매끄럽게 하세요.

例: Yes, I did. I had a small pink bike when I was a child, and I often rode it around the neighborhood with my friends. We used to race each other on quiet streets and stop at the park to rest, so those afternoons were always fun.

提案: 의견은 제시했으나 표현이 모호하고 문법·어휘 선택 오류(‘pretty popular’, 시제·주어 일치, 마지막 문장 의미 불분명)가 보입니다. 더 명확한 주제문을 사용하고 이유를 두세 가지 구체적으로 설명하세요(예: 통근, 운동, 문화). 연결어(for example, because, therefore)를 써서 논리적으로 전개하세요.

例: Yes, I think bicycles are quite popular in my country because many people learned to ride when they were children and find bikes useful for short trips. For example, students often cycle to school, and some people use bicycles to commute to work, especially in smaller cities.

× I have, I had a bike like a little pink bike in my childhood.

✓ I had a little pink bike when I was a child.

The original mixes tenses and uses 'in my childhood' awkwardly. Use past tense 'had' to match the time reference and the common phrasing 'when I was a child'. Suggestion: keep past tense and use natural time expression.'

× I usually, I was usually hanging out with my friend with riding a bike around the neighborhood and it's really funny.

✓ I usually hung out with my friend, riding our bikes around the neighborhood, and it was really fun.

Problems: repeated adverb 'usually' and awkward verb forms. Use simple past 'hung out' for past habitual action; use 'riding our bikes' instead of 'with riding a bike'; use 'it was really fun' to describe past enjoyment. Suggestion: remove repetition, use correct past tense and natural phrasing.'

× Yeah, I think riding a bicycle is quite pretty popular, I guess because the people I knew and I know are most of people had the experience riding a bicycle when their childhood.

✓ Yeah, I think riding bicycles is quite popular, because most of the people I knew and know had the experience of riding a bicycle when they were children.

Issues: word order and tense consistency. Use plural 'bicycles' or 'riding a bicycle is popular' and avoid 'quite pretty'. Keep consistent reference to past experience: 'had the experience' and 'when they were children'. Suggestion: Simplify adjective phrases, make tenses and subject clear, and use 'when they were children' for natural expression.'

× So yeah. And there is a lot of work with.

✓ So yeah. Also, there is a lot of work to do.

The original 'there is a lot of work with' is ungrammatical and unclear. Use 'a lot of work to do' if meaning many tasks remain, or rephrase to 'a lot of traffic' if different meaning intended. Suggestion: choose a complete idiomatic expression and complete the thought.'