Opportunities— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答切题，并用举例和个人经历进行了展开，但最后一句没有说完，严重影响表达的完整性。注意搭配和语法：用“believed/thought”代替“supposed”，用“take part in outdoor activities”或“do more outdoor activities”代替“get more outdoor activities”；“girls should not only...”后面应接“but also...”形成平行结构。最后应明确说明游泳带给你的具体收获，例如自信、健康或快乐。

例: Yes, definitely. My mother encouraged me to try different activities, such as skating, swimming, and playing the piano. She believed that girls should not just stay at home but also take part in outdoor activities. I still enjoy swimming because it helps me stay healthy and makes me feel relaxed.

提案: 回答表达了明确观点，也提到了自信和交友等理由，但语法、词汇和逻辑问题较多。“suppose”应改为“think/believe”，“take more activities”应改为“try more activities”，“movement”和“motivations”在此处不自然；应使用“confidence, motivation, and opportunities to make friends”。“I love to swim when I was a child”应为“I loved swimming when I was a child”，最后的“love to eat too also”与问题无关且表达不清，建议删除。可以用“because/for example”连接理由和个人例子。

例: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities, because this can build their confidence and help them discover their interests. It also gives them opportunities to meet new people. For example, I started swimming as a child, and I still enjoy it because it keeps me fit and helps me relax.

× She supposed girls should not only stay at home but also need to get more outdoor activities.

✓ She believed that girls should not only stay at home but also take part in more outdoor activities.

情态动词should后面应接动词原形。原句中“should ... need”结构不平行。改为“should not only stay ... but also take part ...”，使两个动词形式保持一致。另外，“take part in activities”比“get activities”更符合英语语法和搭配。

× She supposed girls should not only stay at home but also need to get more outdoor activities.

✓ She believed that girls should not only stay at home but also take part in more outdoor activities.

“not only ... but also ...”连接的两个部分应该结构平行。原句中“stay”和“need to get”结构不一致。建议使用“not only + 动词原形 ... but also + 动词原形”的平行结构。

× I still love swimming nowadays 'cause it gave me a such a.

✓ I still love swimming nowadays because it gave me such a great experience.

“such a”后面必须接“形容词+可数名词单数”，例如“such a great experience”。原句中的“a such a”重复使用了冠词，而且句子在冠词后没有完整名词。口语中可以使用“because”，比“'cause”更正式。

× I still love swimming nowadays 'cause it gave me a such a.

✓ I still love swimming nowadays because it gave me such a great experience.

原句在“such a”后面突然结束，句子结构不完整。完整句子需要补充形容词和名词，例如“such a great experience”。建议说完“such a + 形容词 + 名词”的完整结构。

× I literally suppose people should take more activities as they can get a lot of confidence, movement, motivations as well as you know, make more friends with others.

✓ I literally believe people should take part in as many activities as they can because they can gain a lot of confidence and motivation, as well as make more friends.

表达“尽可能多的活动”时，应使用固定结构“as many + 可数名词复数 + as they can”，所以应说“as many activities as they can”。“more activities as they can”结构不完整。

× I literally suppose people should take more activities as they can get a lot of confidence, movement, motivations as well as you know, make more friends with others.

✓ I literally believe people should take part in as many activities as they can because they can gain a lot of confidence and motivation, as well as make more friends.

原句使用“as well as”时，前后结构不够清晰。改为“gain ... as well as make ...”，使两个并列动词保持一致。连接多个原因时，也可以使用“because”来明确表达因果关系。

× As for me, I love to swim when I was a child and until now I love to eat too also.

✓ As for me, I loved swimming when I was a child, and I still love it now.

“when I was a child”表示过去的时间，因此前面的动词应使用过去时“loved”，而不是现在时“love”。“until now”可以更自然地改为“still ... now”。此外，“too also”重复表达“也”，应删除。