Opportunities— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Answer the question directly and use natural collocations. Replace “plenty much opportunities” with “plenty of opportunities,” and use “take part in” or “participate in” rather than “went programs.” Also, avoid unclear phrases such as “Very kind of activities I've had to do.” Organize the answer with a topic sentence, followed by one or two specific examples and a reason or feeling.

例: Yes, I had plenty of opportunities to try new activities as a child. For example, I took part in school races and local running events, especially around my birthdays. I really enjoyed them because they helped me stay active and meet new people.

提案: Give a clear opinion first, then support it with a specific example and a result. Correct “try explore” to “try to explore” or “try exploring,” and avoid repeated fillers such as “like,” “you know,” and “it was really interesting.” Use accurate verb tenses: “I felt it was a new experience” and “I had a new experience.” Linking words such as “for example,” “because,” and “as a result” would make the response more coherent and effective.

例: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities because this helps them discover their interests and develop new skills. For example, when I tried swimming for the first time, I found it challenging but enjoyable. As a result, I became more confident in the water and decided to continue practicing.

× Yes, I had plenty much opportunities when I was a child.

✓ Yes, I had plenty of opportunities when I was a child.

Plenty is followed by of before a plural countable noun. Much is used with uncountable nouns, so it cannot be used with opportunities.

× Yes, I had plenty much opportunities when I was a child.

✓ Yes, I had plenty of opportunities when I was a child.

Opportunities is a countable noun, so it should be plural after plenty of.

× On my birthdays I went many programs like school, marathon and running.

✓ On my birthdays, I went to many programs like school, marathons, and running.

The verb go requires the preposition to when describing attendance at a place or event. For example, we say go to a program or go to a class.

× On my birthdays I went many programs like school, marathon and running.

✓ On my birthdays, I went to many programs like school, marathons, and running.

Marathon should be plural because the sentence refers to many programs and activities. Use the plural form when referring to more than one event.

× Very kind of activities I've had to do.

✓ There were many kinds of activities I had to do.

The original sentence needs a there were structure to introduce the existence of activities. Also, many kinds requires the plural noun kinds.

× Very kind of activities I've had to do.

✓ There were many kinds of activities I had to do.

The original expression is an incomplete sentence because it does not clearly provide a complete subject and verb structure. There were many kinds of activities forms a complete sentence.

× Like it was really interesting for me.

✓ It was really interesting for me.

Like is an unnecessary sentence opener here and makes the statement sound incomplete. Begin directly with the subject It.

× Yeah, people should try explore new things.

✓ Yeah, people should try exploring new things.

After try, use a gerund when describing an activity that someone experiments with or experiences. Try exploring is the appropriate structure here.

× Like it was quite interesting to know, like how it works, how it looks it, you know, it's like some energetic movement on the body, like, whoa, it's a new experience.

✓ It was quite interesting to learn how it works and what it looks like. It was an energetic movement of the body and a new experience.

The pronoun it is repeated incorrectly in how it looks it. The correct structure is what it looks like. Use what it looks like when describing the appearance of something.

× Like it was quite interesting to know, like how it works, how it looks it, you know, it's like some energetic movement on the body, like, whoa, it's a new experience.

✓ It was quite interesting to learn how it works and what it looks like. It was an energetic movement of the body and a new experience.

And is needed to connect the two related ideas how it works and what it looks like. Using and makes the sentence structure clearer and more complete.

× Like it was quite interesting to know, like how it works, how it looks it, you know, it's like some energetic movement on the body, like, whoa, it's a new experience.

✓ It was quite interesting to learn how it works and what it looks like. It was an energetic movement of the body and a new experience.

A is required before the singular countable noun movement. Use a when mentioning one nonspecific movement.

× I'm feeling.

✓ I felt excited.

The speaker is describing a past experience, so the past tense felt is more appropriate than the present continuous form am feeling. Adding excited also makes the meaning complete.

× I'm feeling.

✓ I felt excited.

I am feeling is normally followed by a description, such as excited or nervous. The original sentence is incomplete because feeling has no complement.

× I can remember, like when I started to do swimming for the first time, it was really interesting for me, like I have a new experience.

✓ I can remember that when I started swimming for the first time, it was really interesting for me because I had a new experience.

The experience happened in the past, so have should change to had. The past tense keeps the time reference consistent throughout the sentence.

× I can remember, like when I started to do swimming for the first time, it was really interesting for me, like I have a new experience.

✓ I can remember that when I started swimming for the first time, it was really interesting for me because I had a new experience.

That introduces the remembered event, and because clearly explains the reason. These conjunctions create a complete and logical sentence structure.