Opportunities— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer directly addresses the question, but it contains several grammatical errors, repetitions, and an unfinished sentence. Say “I did taekwondo for a few years,” rather than “I to Taekwondo,” and use “which helped me gain confidence” instead of “which he gained.” Complete your second example and add a specific detail about when or where you did the activity. Use linking words such as “For example” and “In addition” to make your answer more coherent.

例: Yes, I did. I had plenty of opportunities to try new activities when I was a child. For example, I did taekwondo for a few years, which helped me gain confidence and become more disciplined. In addition, I occasionally joined art classes at school.

提案: You give a clear opinion, but the answer is too short and includes repetition and an incomplete example. Replace “different different perspectives” with “different perspectives” and “various experience” with “varied experiences” or “a variety of experiences.” Explain how trying new activities benefits people, and provide a specific example, such as learning a skill or discovering a career interest.

例: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities whenever possible. Doing so exposes them to different perspectives and helps them discover their interests and strengths. For example, someone who tries volunteering may develop useful communication skills and realize that they enjoy working with other people.

× I to Taekwondo for few years which he gained which helped me gain confidence.

✓ I did Taekwondo for a few years, which helped me gain confidence.

The original sentence is missing a main verb after the subject I. Use did to form the past-tense verb phrase did Taekwondo. The phrase which he gained is also incomplete and contains an incorrect pronoun. Use which helped me gain confidence to express the result clearly.

× I did Taekwondo for few years, which helped me gain confidence.

✓ I did Taekwondo for a few years, which helped me gain confidence.

Use the article a before few in the expression a few years. A few means a small number of years and is the correct expression here.

× I to Taekwondo for few years which he gained which helped me gain confidence.

✓ I did Taekwondo for a few years, which helped me gain confidence.

The pronoun he does not agree with the speaker, who is referring to themself. Use me after helped because the speaker is the person who gained confidence. The corrected relative clause, which helped me gain confidence, is also clearer and grammatically complete.

× It gives us different different perspectives and various experience for example.

✓ It gives us different perspectives and various experiences, for example.

Experience is countable in this context because it refers to different kinds of experiences. Therefore, use the plural form experiences after various. Also, avoid repeating different.