Opportunities— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your response repeated the examiner's question and changed pronouns, which did not answer the question. To improve, answer directly with a topic sentence about your childhood opportunities, add one or two specific supporting details using linking words, and keep it concise (no more than 5 sentences). Use past tense and concrete examples.

例: Yes, I had several opportunities to try new activities as a child. For example, my parents encouraged me to join a painting class and a local football team, which helped me learn teamwork and creativity. As a result, I became more confident trying unfamiliar things.

提案: Your answer agrees with the question but has grammatical errors, unclear phrasing, and repetition. To improve, give a clear topic sentence stating your opinion, then add a linked reason and a brief example. Use appropriate pronouns and correct verb forms, and avoid repetition.

例: Yes, I believe people should try as many different things as possible because it broadens their skills and perspectives. For instance, learning a new language or hobby can open career opportunities and increase cultural understanding.

× Did you have any opportunities to take part in your activities as a child?

✓ Did you have any opportunities to take part in new activities as a child?

The student repeated the examiner's question but changed 'new activities' to 'your activities', which is incorrect because the examiner asked about new activities in general, not the examiner's activities. This is an incorrect use of pronouns (Grammar Problem Type ID 12). Suggestion: Use the same noun phrase as the question or an appropriate general noun; avoid changing 'new activities' to 'your activities' unless referring to the examiner's activities explicitly.

× Yes, I think that people try different things when he he can.

✓ Yes, I think that people try different things when they can.

The student used 'he he' which is a repetition and the wrong pronoun for a general subject. This is an incorrect use of pronouns (Grammar Problem Type ID 12) and also contains a typographical repetition. Suggestion: Use the plural pronoun 'they' to match the plural noun 'people' and remove duplicate words; the correct clause is 'when they can' to mean 'when they have the opportunity.'