Opportunities— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答总体自然且表达了观点，但存在冗余和小语法/用词错误（例如“new activity”单数/冠词问题）、句子较为重复，支持细节不足。建议：1) 开头用一句主题句直接回答，如“Yes, I often tried new activities.” 2) 用一至两句具体例子或细节支持（何时、参加过哪些活动、感受或收获）。3) 注意语法与连贯词，如“for example”, “because”来连接原因与例子。4) 控制在3-4句内，避免重复陈述。

例: Yes, I often tried new activities as a child. For example, I joined the school drama club and learned how to play the violin, which helped me become more confident. Because I was outgoing, I usually volunteered for new projects and enjoyed learning different skills.

提案: 观点明确且举例支持，但存在表达重复和语法不准确（如“three master degrees and in different fields”结构混乱）、细节冗长且偏离问题意图（问题偏向普遍建议而非个人经历）。建议：1) 首句直接回答并给出理由，如“Yes, because it broadens your skills.” 2) 用一两句简洁的个人例子说明，而不是重复学位细节；若提及学位，保证语法正确并简洁。3) 使用连接词（because, for instance, therefore）使逻辑更清晰。4) 控制句子数量，避免重复片段。

例: Yes, people should try many different things because it broadens their perspectives and skills. For instance, I studied mechanical engineering and later pursued a master's in engineering management, which helped me combine technical knowledge with leadership abilities.

× So whenever it's a new activity, I was always enthusiastic about that.

✓ So whenever there was a new activity, I was always enthusiastic about it.

句中原本用法不当：'it's a new activity' 使用現在時與前文的過去時不一致，且代詞 'that' 指代不自然。將其改為過去時的 'there was a new activity' 與前句時態一致，並用更自然的代詞 'it'。建議：敘述過去經歷時，保持時態一致，並使用與名詞搭配自然的代詞。

× So when I was a child, I wouldn't give up any opportunity to take part in new activity So whenever it's a new activity, I was always enthusiastic about that.

✓ When I was a child, I wouldn't give up any opportunity to take part in a new activity. Whenever there was a new activity, I was always enthusiastic about it.

原句結構混亂且缺少標點：兩部分應分成兩句，且 'new activity' 前需不定冠詞 'a'。另外時態需統一為過去。建議：用清晰的句子邊界和正確冠詞；描述過去習慣時用過去時態。

× For example, I'm thirty years old now and I have three master degrees and in different fields.

✓ For example, I'm thirty years old now and I have three master's degrees in different fields.

名詞短語 'master degrees' 應使用所有格形式 'master's degrees' 或 'master's degree'，並且介詞 'in' 應直接接在 'degrees' 後以表領域。建議：英語中學位名稱常用所有格形式（a master's degree）；表示多個學位時用複數。

× I got my bachelor degree in the field of mechanical engineering, I got my I got my master's degree in the field of engineering management.

✓ I got my bachelor's degree in mechanical engineering, and I got my master's degree in engineering management.

原句為逗號連接兩個獨立分句且有重複片段 'I got my'。學位名同樣應用所有格 'bachelor's degree'，並省略冗長的 'in the field of' 以使表達更自然。建議：使用連詞 'and' 或分號分隔獨立分句，刪去重複，簡化常用搭配（e.g. 'in mechanical engineering'）。

× You know, I'm a very outgoing person. So when I was a child, I wouldn't give up any opportunity to take part in new activity

✓ You know, I'm a very outgoing person. So when I was a child, I wouldn't give up any opportunity to take part in new activities.

短語 'new activity' 應為複數 'new activities'，因為指的是多種不同的活動機會；原句缺少複數標記造成單複數錯誤。建議：談及多次或多種活動時使用複數形式。