Opportunities— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve clarity, grammar and coherence: start with a clear topic sentence, fix grammar errors (e.g., "a new activities" → "new activities"), use linking words to connect ideas, and avoid minor redundancy. Add one specific example to make the response more vivid.

例: Yes — I had many opportunities. For example, my mother enrolled me in dancing, painting and singing classes outside school, and I discovered I was quite good at dancing. In addition, I took several extra courses offered by a local arts center, which gave me plenty of chances to practice and improve my skills.

提案: Improve grammatical accuracy and cohesion: begin with a clear topic sentence, correct errors ("discover they interested in" → "discover what they are interested in"), use linking phrases for contrast (e.g., "on the other hand"), and provide a brief specific example to support the opinion.

例: Yes, people should try many different things to discover what they are interested in, because exposure helps reveal strengths. However, on the other hand, once someone finds an activity they enjoy and have talent for — for instance, a friend who tried several sports and then focused on swimming — it makes sense to concentrate on that area to develop professional-level skills.

× When I was a child my mother allowed me to try a new activities outside school such as dancing, painting and singing and I discovered I was quite good at them.

✓ When I was a child my mother allowed me to try new activities outside school such as dancing, painting and singing, and I discovered I was quite good at them.

The phrase 'a new activities' mixes singular article 'a' with plural noun 'activities', causing an article error (ID 22). Remove 'a' to match the plural noun: 'try new activities'. Also add a comma before 'and' to join two independent clauses correctly.

× So I can say that I had plenty of chances to practice and improve my skills.

✓ So I can say that I had plenty of chances to practice and improve my skills.

This sentence mixes present 'can say' with past 'had' intentionally to express a present ability to state a past experience. It is grammatically acceptable; no change needed. No error per the provided list, so keep as is.

× Of course people should try different things to discover they interested in.

✓ Of course people should try different things to discover what they are interested in.

The original sentence omits the object 'what' and misuses the pronoun 'they' without a verb. This is a sentence structure and pronoun issue (IDs 26 and 12). Add 'what' and the verb 'are' to form the noun clause 'what they are interested in.'

× Build a range of skill because exposure helps you find your strengths.

✓ Build a range of skills because exposure helps you find your strengths.

The imperative fragment 'Build a range of skill' uses uncountable or singular 'skill' incorrectly; the intended meaning is plural 'skills' (article/quantifier and count noun issue, IDs 14 and 26). Also ensure it connects to the previous sentence—make it a complete imperative sentence 'Build a range of skills.'

× However, once you find something you enjoy and have talent for, it's usually better to focus on it and develop professional level expertise so you can progress further in that field.

✓ However, once you find something you enjoy and have talent for, it's usually better to focus on it and develop professional-level expertise so you can progress further in that field.

The phrase 'professional level expertise' needs a hyphen when used as a compound modifier before a noun: 'professional-level expertise.' This is an adjective formation/word-formation issue (ID 13). The tense and structure are otherwise correct.