Opportunities— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Bạn cần trả lời trực tiếp và rõ ràng hơn, tránh từ thừa và ngập ngừng. Cố gắng sử dụng một câu chủ đề ngắn gọn sau đó bổ sung 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ: loại hoạt động, tần suất, cảm nhận). Sử dụng liên từ đơn giản để kết nối ý (for example, because, and). Ngoài ra sửa ngữ pháp: “I often had the chance to take part in activities at school, for example I joined the music club because I liked singing.”

例: Yes. When I was a child I often had the chance to take part in school activities. For example, I joined the music club twice a week because I loved singing, and that helped me become more confident in front of others.

提案: Câu trả lời thiếu rõ ràng và lẫn lộn, có nhiều ngập ngừng và lỗi cấu trúc. Cần đưa ra một câu chủ đề rõ ràng nêu quan điểm, sau đó giải thích lý do với 1–2 dẫn chứng cụ thể. Tránh lặp từ, dùng liên từ như because, however để mạch lạc. Ví dụ sửa: “I think people should try new things to a certain extent because it helps them learn, but they should choose carefully.”

例: I think people should try new things, but only to a reasonable extent. For example, trying different hobbies or meeting new people can broaden your perspective, but it's also important to focus on what suits you best so you don’t waste time.

× When I was a child, I often had chance to train activities at school and I thought at the music club because I like singing, for example.

✓ When I was a child, I often had the chance to take part in activities at school, and I joined the music club because I liked singing, for example.

The phrase 'had chance' needs the definite article 'the' (article error). 'Train activities' is incorrect collocation; use 'take part in activities' or 'participate in activities'. 'I thought at the music club' is ungrammatical; the intended meaning is likely 'I joined the music club' (sentence structure). Also tense consistency: talking about childhood requires past tense 'liked' instead of 'like'. Suggestions: use 'the chance', use 'take part in' for participating, use 'joined' for becoming a member, and keep past tense for past events.

× Well, it's a, it's a long question. In my opinion, I think people should try, I, uh, try different things to some extent.

✓ Well, it's a long question. In my opinion, people should try different things to some extent.

There is redundancy and awkward present tense repetition 'I think people should try, I, uh, try' (sentence structure and present tense usage). Simplify to a clear present-tense statement. Suggestions: remove filler words and avoid repeating the verb; say 'In my opinion, people should try different things' for clarity.

× Uh, is have try different things and new activities, activities, relationship and many people.

✓ I mean, people should try different things, new activities, and meet many people.

Original sentence is ungrammatical and lacks correct verb forms and coordination (sentence structure error). 'Is have try' is incorrect—use 'people should try' or 'I mean, people should try'. Repetition 'activities, activities' should be removed. 'Relationship' should be plural or rephrased as 'meet many people' depending on intended meaning. Suggestions: start with a clear subject and modal 'should', use parallel noun phrases separated by commas, and use appropriate verbs like 'meet' for interacting with people.