Tiredness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答基本直接，但后半部分出现大量重复、停顿和无法理解的表达，影响自然度和清晰度。建议先明确说明“经常疲惫”，再给出一个具体原因，例如睡眠不足、学习压力或药物副作用。避免重复使用“breathe”，并使用完整、简单的句子。

例: Yes, I often feel tired, to be honest. This is mainly because my ADHD medication sometimes affects my sleep and makes me feel uncomfortable. As a result, I do not always feel fully rested during the day.

提案: 回答提到了具体时间和药物原因，这是好的内容方向，但句子结构混乱，且“on that day”使用不准确。建议用清晰的时间顺序表达：先说明通常在下午感到疲惫，再解释药效减退后出现的身体反应。可以使用“usually”“because”“when the effect wears off”等连接和表达。

例: I usually feel tired in the afternoon, especially when the effect of my ADHD medication starts to wear off. At that point, my heart may beat faster, and I often feel uncomfortable and low on energy.

提案: 回答有尝试根据疲劳程度进行分类，但“ignore them”中的代词指代不清，“lay under bed”也不自然；应说“lie on my bed”或“take a short nap”。建议直接说明不同程度的应对方式，并控制在三到四个清晰句子内。

例: It depends on how tired I feel. If I am extremely exhausted, I usually take a nap or go to bed early. If I am only slightly tired, I lie on my bed for a while, drink some water, and relax.

提案: 回答立场明确，也给出了“不外出”的原因，但后半部分重复较多，且“my friends cannot stand for that”语气不够自然。建议先直接回答，再用“because”说明自己疲惫时不太健谈，最后可以补充朋友可能会担心或觉得气氛尴尬。

例: Not really. I usually stay at home because I am not very talkative when I feel tired. I would probably sit quietly and have little energy for conversation, so my friends might worry that I was not enjoying myself.

× Yes, I often feel tired to be honest because I sometimes feel really We cannot breathe regularly and can brace hold a braise cannot can't breathe fluently yeah.

✓ Yes, I often feel tired, to be honest, because sometimes I feel that I cannot breathe normally.

原句中出现了多个重复、断裂和无法组成完整句子的片段，导致句子结构混乱。可以用“feel that + 从句”表达“感觉自己……”，并删除重复或无意义的词语。

× It stepped sometimes in the afternoon.

✓ It sometimes happens in the afternoon.

这里描述的是经常发生的情况，应使用一般现在时。主语“It”是第三人称单数，因此动词应使用“happens”；“stepped”是过去式，不能用于表达习惯性情况。

× Because on that day I took my ADHD medicine.

✓ Because I take my ADHD medicine during the day.

问题询问的是通常什么时候感到疲劳，回答应使用一般现在时，而不是过去式“took”。“take”表示平时服用药物的习惯。

× It’s the side effect of this is when the when the dose when the medicine dose wears off and it will make the heart fast.

✓ One side effect occurs when the medicine wears off, and it makes my heart beat faster.

原句包含多个重复的从句，且“The side effect of this is when...”结构不完整。可以使用“主语 + occurs when...”表达“副作用在……时出现”。“make”后面应接“宾语 + 动词原形”，所以用“makes my heart beat faster”。

× I really ignore them because sometimes it depends it’s depends on the level of tired tiredness.

✓ I usually ignore it, because it depends on how tired I am.

描述平时的反应时使用一般现在时。不能说“it’s depends”；“depends”本身已经是动词，不需要再加“is”。另外，“tiredness”应改为更自然的结构“how tired I am”。

× If it’s extremely tired, I really sleep.

✓ If I am extremely tired, I go to sleep.

“tired”通常用来描述人，而不是用“It”指代人的状态，因此应使用“I am extremely tired”。“go to sleep”比“really sleep”更自然地表达“去睡觉”。

× If it’s normal tired, I lay under bed.

✓ If I am normally tired, I lie in bed.

表达人在床上休息时，通常使用介词“in”，即“lie in bed”，而不是“under bed”。“lie”表示“躺下/躺着”，这里应使用现在时“lie”，不是过去式“lay”。

× If it’s if it’s not so normal.

✓ If it is not too bad, I usually stay in bed.

原句重复了“If it’s”，并且只有条件从句，没有完整的主句。英语中的“If”条件句通常需要“if从句 + 主句”，因此补充“I usually stay in bed”使句子完整。

× Not really. I won’t go out because I cannot speak with my...

✓ Not really. I don’t go out because I cannot talk to my friends when I am tired.

问题询问的是通常情况下的行为，因此应使用一般现在时“don’t go out”，而不是表示将来的“won’t go out”。“speak with my”后面缺少完整宾语，所以改为完整的“talk to my friends”。

× I’m not kind of talkative person.

✓ I’m not a talkative person.

可数名词单数“person”前需要冠词。这里应使用不定冠词“a”，所以是“a talkative person”。

× I’m not the kind of person talking talk. I’m not a talkative person.

✓ I’m not the kind of person who talks a lot. I’m not a talkative person.

“the kind of person”后面通常需要用“who + 动词”引导定语从句，因此应说“the kind of person who talks a lot”。原句中的“talking talk”重复且结构不完整。

× If I am tired, I am going to be so silent.

✓ If I am tired, I am usually very quiet.

这里描述的是疲劳时通常的状态，应使用一般现在时“am usually”，而不是将来表达“am going to be”。“quiet”比“silent”更适合描述一个人不太说话的状态。

× If I am tired I am going to be so silent my friends cannot stand for that.

✓ If I am tired, I am usually very quiet, and my friends cannot stand it.

原句包含两个独立分句，中间缺少连接词或标点。应在“If”条件句后加逗号，并使用“and”连接后面的分句，使结构完整。

× My friends cannot stand for that.

✓ My friends cannot stand it.

“stand”表示“无法忍受”时，直接接宾语，不需要介词“for”。因此应说“cannot stand it”，而不是“cannot stand for that”。