Tiredness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct minor grammar errors, and avoid repetitions. Add a brief specific reason to support your statement using a linking phrase.

例: Yes, I often feel tired in the afternoons because I usually use up most of my energy during the morning. For example, I teach classes until lunchtime, which leaves me drained by mid-afternoon.

提案: Organize your answer with a clear topic sentence and use linking words to show sequence. Correct verb tense and remove repetition. Provide one or two specific activities that cause the tiredness.

例: I usually feel tired in the afternoon, especially after a long morning at the office. For instance, answering emails and attending meetings until lunchtime leaves me low on energy, and the commute home on the bus makes me even more tired.

提案: Use correct verb forms and link actions coherently. Begin with a clear topic sentence, then give a brief sequence of actions using linking phrases (first, then, after that). Include a specific detail about the nap or other strategy to make it more informative.

例: When I feel tired after work, I usually take a 20–30 minute power nap first to recharge. After that, I prepare dinner for my family and try to finish chores early so I can go to bed at a reasonable time.

× Yes, I do feel tired every afternoon. It is a it is the time when I usually used up my energy for the day.

✓ Yes, I do feel tired every afternoon. It is the time when I usually use up my energy for the day.

The error involves incorrect tense use: 'used up' is past tense but the sentence describes a habitual present action. Use simple present 'use up' to match habitual context. Also remove the duplicated 'it is'. Suggestion: say 'It is the time when I usually use up my energy for the day.'

× I often feel tired during the afternoon because I used most of my energy within the day from from morning to my work office and then going home then when I ride the bus.

✓ I often feel tired in the afternoon because I use most of my energy during the day, from the morning at my office job until I go home and ride the bus.

Multiple issues: 'used' is past tense but the context is habitual so use present 'use' (past tense issue). Preposition choices also corrected: 'during the afternoon' -> 'in the afternoon', 'within the day' -> 'during the day'. Removed duplicate 'from'. 'my work office' -> 'my office job' for natural phrasing; adjusted clause order to be grammatical. Suggestions: use simple present for habitual actions and choose appropriate prepositions ('in' for parts of day, 'during' for time periods).

× When I got from work I usually take a power nap, then after that I will prepare my dinner and for the rest of the family. And go to bed early.

✓ When I get home from work I usually take a power nap; after that I prepare dinner for the rest of the family and go to bed early.

'Got' is past tense but the sentence refers to a habitual action; use simple present 'get' (this relates to past participle/past tense misuse). Also word order 'got from work' -> 'get home from work' is more natural. 'I will prepare' changed to 'I prepare' to match habitual tense. The fragment 'And go to bed early' was combined into the main sentence. Suggestion: use simple present for routines, ensure subject and verb are present in each clause and avoid sentence fragments.