Tiredness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, and avoid fillers. Use one or two brief reasons to support your answer and keep it within 2–3 sentences. For example, say whether you often feel tired now, then add a clear frequency and a reason.

例: Yes, recently I often feel tired. I’ve been working long hours and don’t get enough sleep, so I usually feel sleepy in the afternoons.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question and then give specific, coherent examples using linking words. Correct grammar and phrasing (e.g., 'because of', 'for example') will make your response more natural. Limit to 2–3 sentences and be specific about situations and causes.

例: I feel tired when I can’t do things I planned, especially because of work. For example, if I miss time to read a book or skip my regular exercise due to a heavy workload, I quickly become drained.

提案: Start with a clear statement of your usual action, then give one or two specific examples and a brief reason. Avoid repetition and negatives like 'No, it's not' in short answers; instead, contrast briefly. Keep it concise and coherent with linking words (e.g., 'instead', 'for example').

例: I try to relax by resting without my phone and by doing light activities instead. For example, I sit quietly for fifteen minutes or go for a short walk because those help me feel refreshed more than scrolling on my phone.

× Uh, it's changes time to time, but lately, yes, I feel often tired.

✓ Uh, it changes from time to time, but lately, yes, I often feel tired.

Use of 'it's changes' is incorrect: 'it changes' (present simple) is correct for general occurrences, and 'from time to time' is the standard prepositional phrase. Also adverb placement: 'often' should come before the main verb 'feel' in present simple: 'I often feel tired'. Suggestion: say 'it changes from time to time' and place adverbs before the verb in simple tenses.

× When I can't fulfill my wishes in my day-to-day life.

✓ When I can't fulfill my wishes in my day-to-day life.

No correction needed for preposition here; sentence fragment lacks main clause but is acceptable as answer to 'When would you feel tired?'. If treated as fragment, ensure it links to main sentence: 'I feel tired when I can't fulfill my wishes in my day-to-day life.' The main issue is sentence structure rather than preposition.

× Like reading a book that I want to read or doing my exercise.

✓ For example, not being able to read a book I want or to do my exercises.

Original is a fragment beginning with 'Like' and repeats 'read'. Improve by making it a complete clause and parallel structure: 'not being able to read a book I want or to do my exercises.' Use parallel infinitives and avoid sentence fragment starters.

× Also it can be reason from my busy work lot.

✓ Also, it can be because of my heavy workload.

'Reason from my busy work lot' is ungrammatical. Use 'because of' to indicate cause and 'workload' (one word) or 'busy work' is incorrect here. 'Heavy workload' is the natural collocation. Include a comma after 'Also'.

× I try to really relax by doing nothing because many people have a false impression that scrolling on phone is relaxing.

✓ I try to really relax by doing nothing because many people have the false impression that scrolling on the phone is relaxing.

'Scrolling on phone' needs article: 'on the phone' or 'on their phones'. Also 'a false impression' can be 'the false impression' when referring to a commonly held belief. The gerund 'scrolling' is correct; adjust article use for natural English.

× No, it's not.

✓ No, it is not relaxing.

While 'No, it's not.' is understandable, as a spoken short answer it's fine. For clarity and completeness in this context, expand to 'No, it is not relaxing.' This improves coherence with previous clause.

× So I really try to do activities or just not doing anything to really feel relaxed.

✓ So I really try to do activities or just do nothing to really feel relaxed.

Parallel structure error: 'try to do activities' uses infinitive, so the alternative should also use infinitive: 'do nothing' rather than 'not doing anything.' Use parallel forms after 'try to' for grammatical consistency.