Tiredness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise, use correct grammar and a clear topic sentence. Begin with a direct answer, then give one or two specific reasons using correct verb forms and linking words. Avoid repetition and unnecessary words.

例: Yes, I often feel tired because I am a PhD student and do a lot of research. For example, long experiments and data analysis leave me exhausted, and when experiments don’t go well I also feel anxious.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence stating the main situations, then give two specific examples with linking words (firstly, secondly). Correct grammar and clearer nouns (e.g. ‘basic English’, ‘research tasks’) will improve clarity.

例: I usually feel tired in two situations. Firstly, when I study English because practicing speaking and writing takes extra time due to my weak English foundation. Secondly, I feel tired during intensive research periods with long lab sessions and tight deadlines.

提案: Answer directly with a topic sentence about your actions to cope with tiredness. Provide one or two specific coping strategies using correct grammar and linking words. Avoid repeating reasons; focus on solutions and be concise.

例: When I feel tired, I usually take short breaks and get some sleep to recharge. For example, after an hour of studying English I take a 20-minute walk or a nap, which helps me return to work more focused.

× Yes, I often feel tired because I'm a PD student I and I have to do the many research and especially when I experiment in smoothly and got a better result I will tired and anxious.

✓ Yes, I often feel tired because I'm a PhD student and I have to do a lot of research. Especially when an experiment goes smoothly and gets better results, I feel tired and anxious.

Multiple sentence structure mistakes: run-on sentences, incorrect word order, and wrong word forms. 'PD student I and I' is a run-on and misordering; correct to 'I'm a PhD student and I'. 'the many research' uses an incorrect article and noun form; correct to 'a lot of research'. 'when I experiment in smoothly and got a better result' mixes tenses and has wrong preposition; correct to 'when an experiment goes smoothly and gets better results'. 'I will tired and anxious' uses wrong verb form and tense; correct to 'I feel tired and anxious'. Suggestion: Break complex ideas into clear sentences, use correct noun phrases (a lot of research), match verb tenses (present for general statements), and use correct verb forms (feel, go, get).

× Most time on the huge pressure when I study English to practice speaking or writing is difficult for me because my English basic is so bad so I need to spend more time to study it so I will feel very tired and 2nd when I do research.

✓ Most of the time I feel a lot of pressure when I study English. Practicing speaking or writing is difficult for me because my basic English is poor, so I need to spend more time studying it and I feel very tired. I also feel tired when I do research.

Tense and structure problems: 'Most time on the huge pressure' is incorrect; correct to 'Most of the time I feel a lot of pressure'. 'when I study English to practice speaking or writing is difficult' is ungrammatical; separate clauses and use present simple for general facts: 'Practicing speaking or writing is difficult for me'. 'my English basic is so bad' uses incorrect noun order; use 'my basic English is poor'. 'need to spend more time to study it' should be 'spend more time studying it'. 'so I will feel very tired and 2nd when I do research' mixes future 'will' unnecessarily and unclear sequencing; use present 'I feel very tired' and add 'I also feel tired when I do research'. Suggestion: Use present simple for habitual situations, correct noun order, use gerunds after 'spend time', and split long sentences for clarity.

× Well, when I'm at doing some conflict complex things for me and I will feel tired.

✓ Well, when I'm doing some things that are complex or difficult for me, I feel tired.

Incorrect use of 'at' before a gerund and awkward adjective order: 'I'm at doing' is wrong; say 'I'm doing'. 'conflict complex things' is ungrammatical; correct to 'things that are complex or difficult'. Also unnecessary future 'I will feel tired' for habitual reaction; use present simple 'I feel tired'. Suggestion: Remove 'at' before gerund, use clear adjective order ('complex or difficult'), and use present simple for habitual responses.

× For example, when I practice speaking and writing English is is very difficult for me because my English is too bad and always need a lot of sleep time to.

✓ For example, practicing speaking and writing in English is very difficult for me because my English is poor and I always need a lot of sleep.

Adjective/adverb and sentence structure errors: 'when I practice speaking and writing English is is very difficult' has duplicate 'is' and misplaced clauses; better as 'practicing speaking and writing in English is very difficult for me'. 'my English is too bad' is informal and awkward; use 'my English is poor'. 'always need a lot of sleep time to' is incorrect word order and unnecessary 'to'; correct to 'I always need a lot of sleep'. Suggestion: Use gerunds for activities (practicing), avoid duplicate words, choose precise adjectives (poor), and use natural noun phrases ('a lot of sleep').