Politeness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the response more natural and concise: correct minor grammar (advice, listened), use a clear topic sentence and one or two specific supporting details with a linking word. Stay within 3–4 sentences.

例: I learned politeness mainly by watching my mother. For example, I listened to how she greeted neighbors and resolved conflicts calmly, and at school my teacher encouraged us to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’ These examples helped me adopt polite habits from an early age.

提案: Fix grammatical errors and avoid repetition. Start with a clear opinion sentence, then give one or two distinct reasons using linking words (for example, because, therefore). Keep sentences varied but concise.

例: Yes, I think politeness is very important because it helps build and maintain good relationships. For example, being respectful makes others more willing to cooperate, and it also reflects well on your character.

提案: Good idea expressed clearly; tighten language and use a linking word to show examples. Replace vague phrases (at all times, most especially) with precise examples and reduce length to 2–3 sentences.

例: We should be polite on any occasion, not just special ones. For example, always saying ‘thank you’ when someone helps you and using ‘please’ when asking for assistance shows basic courtesy.

提案: Make the answer more fluent and natural by using a clear topic sentence and one specific example. Correct tense consistency (use past tense) and avoid awkward phrasing like 'supposed to.'

例: As a child I showed politeness by always saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’ For instance, I thanked classmates who helped me with homework and politely asked friends to share their things.

× I learned to be polite as a child by simply following the advices of my mother.

✓ I learned to be polite as a child by simply following the advice of my mother.

'Advice' is an uncountable noun and should not take the plural form 'advices'. Use 'advice' without an plural marker. To refer to multiple pieces, say 'pieces of advice' or 'advice from my mother'.

× I usually listen to how she talks to other people and I also get to learn it from school because my teacher often reminds us the importance of kindness.

✓ I usually listen to how she talks to other people, and I also learned it at school because my teacher often reminded us of the importance of kindness.

The sentence mixes present ('usually listen', 'get to learn') with past context ('learned as a child'). Maintain past tense for consistency. Use 'learned' (past) and 'reminded' (past). Also use 'at school' (common collocation) and 'reminded us of' is the correct verb + preposition.

× Not does it only foster your relationship with other people, it also builds your character as a person.

✓ Not only does it foster your relationships with other people, it also builds your character as a person.

The correlative 'not only... but also' requires inversion after 'not only' when followed by an auxiliary: 'Not only does it foster...'. Also 'relationship' should be plural 'relationships' to reflect interactions with multiple people.

× This also creates respect between two people and it does create a better and deeper understanding of one another.

✓ This also creates respect between people and creates a better, deeper understanding of one another.

'Between two people' restricts to exactly two; 'between people' is more general. Remove redundant 'it does create' — simple present 'creates' is sufficient. Combine 'better and deeper' with comma for concise style.

× I believe that being polite doesn't require a special occasion.

✓ I believe that being polite does not require a special occasion.

Contraction 'doesn't' is acceptable in speech, but for clarity use full 'does not'. More importantly, this sentence is grammatically correct; change is stylistic. Kept as present tense since general truth.

× I think that everyone should be polite at all times, most especially when you want to express gratitude to someone who has done something for you, or to say please to somebody you want assistance from.

✓ I think that everyone should be polite at all times, especially when they want to express gratitude to someone who has helped them, or when they say 'please' to someone from whom they want assistance.

Avoid switching person ('everyone' with 'you'); use 'they' as a singular gender-neutral pronoun. Use 'has helped them' rather than 'has done something for you' for clarity. Rephrase 'somebody you want assistance from' to 'someone from whom they want assistance' to avoid ending with a preposition and to be more formal. Quotation marks kept for the word please—this is stylistic.

× I was able to show politeness when I was young through saying thank you and please to other people.

✓ I was able to show politeness when I was young by saying 'thank you' and 'please' to other people.

Use 'by saying' (common preposition+gerund) rather than 'through saying'. Quotation marks around the expressions clarify them. Tense stays past to match 'when I was young'.

× It doesn't mean that I am supposed to say these things only to older people, but I also say these expressions to people who are at my age.

✓ It didn't mean that I was supposed to say these things only to older people; I also said these expressions to people my age.

Maintain past tense to match earlier sentence ('I was able... when I was young'). Change 'people who are at my age' to 'people my age' which is natural and concise. Also replace contraction 'doesn't' with past 'didn't'.