Politeness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clearer and more fluent. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Use linking words and correct simple grammar (e.g., past tense). Avoid repetition and unclear phrases.

例: When I was a child, my parents taught me to say “please” and “thank you.” For example, they reminded me to use these words when speaking with elders, and they explained that politeness helps build good relationships. As a result, I practised these expressions every day.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and then one specific reason with an example. Use correct noun forms and smoother linking words (e.g., because, therefore, for example). Keep it concise (max 5 sentences).

例: Yes, I think being polite is very important because it helps people cooperate and avoid conflicts. For example, in the workplace, polite language makes communication smoother and helps maintain good relationships with colleagues.

提案: Answer directly with a few specific occasions and one brief reason or example. Avoid vague phrases and repetition. Use linking words like 'especially' or 'for example' correctly and keep sentences grammatically correct.

例: We should be polite in many situations, especially when meeting supervisors, elderly people, or clients. For example, speaking respectfully to a supervisor can create a positive impression and help you receive better guidance.

提案: Give one clear, specific action you did as a child and explain briefly why or how often. Avoid confusing modern actions (like sending emails) when talking about childhood unless you explain age context. Use past tense and correct word order.

例: As a child, I always said “please” and “thank you” to older people and helped them carry things. I practised these habits daily because my parents praised polite behaviour and showed me how to act.

× When I was a child my parents told me Oh So I I can use the please thank you to talk to elderly people because when I arrive to the elderly people to talk communicate with many things I should

✓ When I was a child, my parents told me that I could use 'please' and 'thank you' when talking to elderly people because when I talked with them about many things, I should be polite.

The sentence misuses pronouns and has unclear referents ('me Oh So I I'). Replace with 'that I could' to report parental advice (modal verb corrected) and use 'when talking to elderly people' for correct pronoun and gerund structure. Also add commas and articles for clarity. Grammar problem type ID: 12.

× Yes, I think so because Because in real situations being polite is a necessary social abilities in nowadays.

✓ Yes, I think so because in real situations being polite is a necessary social ability nowadays.

The phrase used the plural 'abilities' while the abstract noun 'ability' should be singular. Remove redundant 'Because' and 'in' before 'nowadays'. Use 'nowadays' without 'in'. Grammar problem type ID: 13.

× So I think it's quite important to maintain the relationship to another one.

✓ So I think it's quite important to maintain relationships with others.

'Another one' is an incorrect pronoun for general relationships. Use the plural 'relationships' and 'others' or 'with other people'. Also change preposition 'to' to 'with'. Grammar problem type ID: 12.

× I think in real situations many kinds of situations have to be polite, especially when we met the supervisor or elderly people because it can bring bring some know how and deep learning knowledge to me and we can learn

✓ I think we should be polite in many real-life situations, especially when we meet supervisors or elderly people, because they can share useful knowledge and experience with me and we can learn from them.

The original is repetitive and has tense inconsistency ('met' should be 'meet') and duplicated word 'bring'. Rephrase to a clearer structure: 'we should be polite', correct present tense 'meet', use 'supervisors' plural and 'share useful knowledge and experience' for natural collocation, and finish the sentence with 'learn from them'. Grammar problem type ID: 26.

× As I mentioned above, I always tell thank you and please to the elder people.

✓ As I mentioned above, I always say 'thank you' and 'please' to elderly people.

Use 'say' rather than 'tell' for fixed expressions. 'Elder people' is nonstandard; use 'elderly people'. Also remove 'the' for general statements. Subject-verb agreement is fine but verb choice needed. Grammar problem type ID: 2.

× And in my inner child, I usually I send the main email and having a communication with my elderly people.

✓ And when I was a child, I usually sent letters or messages and communicated with elderly people.

The phrase 'in my inner child' is incorrect for referring to childhood; use 'when I was a child'. 'Send the main email' is unclear; replace with 'sent letters or messages'. Use past tense 'sent' and 'communicated' to match the time frame. Prepositions adjusted and unnecessary 'my' removed before 'elderly people'. Grammar problem type ID: 11.