Politeness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 首先，你的回答缺乏句子結構與時態一致性，語法錯誤和詞彙使用不準確（例如“played to other people”應為“be polite to other people”）。回答也未能形成完整的主題句與支持細節，語言冗長且不連貫。改進要點：1) 開始用一個清晰的主題句直接回答問題；2) 使用正確時態與簡單句型，避免重複；3) 用一到兩句補充具體細節（誰教你、怎麼教的、例子），並用連接詞（for example, when）使語意連貫；4) 控制在最多五句內。

例: My mother taught me to be polite when I was a child. She always told me to call older people ‘aunt’ or ‘uncle’ as a sign of respect. For example, whenever guests came to our house, she reminded me to greet them politely and say thank you. This helped me learn good manners early.

提案: 回答有明確立場但表達含糊且有多處詞彙錯誤（例如“played to other”/“play to behave”），句子結構混亂，連接詞使用不當。改進要點：1) 先用一個簡潔的主題句表明觀點；2) 用一兩句具體理由支持觀點，使用正確的詞彙（polite, respectful）；3) 使用連接詞如 because, therefore, for example 來組織邏輯；4) 保持語句簡明。

例: Yes, I believe politeness is very important because it helps people communicate respectfully. For example, children who learn good manners early are more likely to get along with classmates and teachers. Therefore, politeness can improve relationships throughout life.

提案: 回答中語言不流暢且多次停頓，詞彙錯誤（“should we be played”應為“we should be polite”），缺乏具體且有代表性的場合。改進要點：1) 直接回答並列出2–3個具體場合；2) 用連接詞（for example, such as）連接細節；3) 給出簡短說明為何在這些場合需要禮貌；4) 控制句數與清晰用詞。

例: We should be polite in many situations, such as when dining with elderly people, during formal events, and when meeting someone for the first time. For example, using polite language at a dinner shows respect to older relatives and makes a good impression.

提案: 這個回答相對清晰且有例子，但語句結尾不完整且有輕微重複。改進要點：1) 保持句子完整，避免重複詞語；2) 可以再加一個具體行為細節（例如行為或措辭如 握手、道謝）；3) 使用一兩個過渡詞（for example, also）讓細節更流暢；4) 控制在最多五句內。

例: As a child, I showed politeness by addressing older people as ‘uncle’ or ‘aunt’ to show respect. For example, when meeting a neighbor or family friend, I would greet them politely and say ‘thank you’ after receiving help. I was also taught to listen carefully and not interrupt adults.

× One night was a child, my mother always teach me if you in court the aunt and uncle you should you should be played to other people.

✓ When I was a child, my mother always taught me that if you are with aunts and uncles you should be polite to other people.

原句句子结构混乱，多处时态和用词错误： 1) “One night was a child” 语序和表达错误，正确应为“When I was a child”（当我还是小孩时）。 2) “my mother always teach me” 动词时态与主语不一致，应使用过去时“taught”。 3) “if you in court the aunt and uncle” 可能想表达“与叔伯阿姨在一起”，应改为“if you are with aunts and uncles”。 4) 重复 “you should you should be played to other people” 用词错误，“be played to” 非常规表达，正确为“be polite to”。 改进建议：先理清时间状语（When I was a child），主句用过去时（taught），从句保持完整（that + 主谓），使用恰当短语（be polite to）。

× You should call aunt, you should call grandmother, grandfather and uncle.

✓ You should call them aunt, grandmother, grandfather, and uncle.

原句缺少宾语代词，且列举时结构需并列且使用复数或指代。建议在称呼一组长辈时用“them”来指代这些人，列举时使用逗号分隔并在最后加“and”。中文建议：补上宾语代词并注意并列结构。

× So when I was.

✓ So when I was young.

原句不完整，缺少补语或时间状语，导致句子不完整。应补上“young”或完整从句（例如“when I was young”或“when I was a child”）。改进建议：说话时检查句子是否有主语和谓语并构成完整意思。

× I think it is very significant for everyone to be played to other.

✓ I think it is very important for everyone to be polite to others.

原句用词错误：“significant”虽可用但搭配不自然，且“be played to other” 是错误短语。应使用“be polite to others”。中文建议：用常用搭配“important”与“be polite to someone”。

× If children then play to behave early, they are more likely to communicate respectfully with others and when they were, when they are teenager adults for example, they will be better.

✓ If children learn to behave politely early, they are more likely to communicate respectfully with others; for example, when they are teenagers or adults, they will behave better.

原句有多处结构问题： 1) “then play to behave early” 语序和动词使用错误，改为“learn to behave politely early”。 2) 时态混用，“when they were, when they are teenager adults” 表达混乱，应统一为“when they are teenagers or adults”。 3) 结尾“they will be better” 不明确，改为“they will behave better”。 改进建议：把条件句主体简化为“If + 现在时, 主句用将来时/一般现在时”，并用明确词汇表达行为变化。

× In my opinion, I think there are many occasions should we be played, for example, if we have dinner with elderly and if we, uh, join, uh, if we join the activity or we should, uh, we should.

✓ In my opinion, I think there are many occasions when we should be polite, for example, if we have dinner with the elderly or if we join an activity.

原句中“there are many occasions should we be played” 语序错误且“be played” 用词不当，且“elderly” 需加定冠词“the elderly”表示老年人群体，“join the activity” 应改为“join an activity”或“join activities”。改进建议：使用“occasions when” 引导定语从句，使用“be polite”表达礼貌，注意冠词和不定项的使用。

× When I was a child, my mother always taught me to address older people as uncle, aunt and grandmother, grandfather and so on to show respect.

✓ When I was a child, my mother always taught me to address older people as uncle, aunt, grandmother, grandfather and so on to show respect.

原句主要问题是标点与并列结构不清晰，应在列举中使用逗号将称呼项分隔清楚，“uncle, aunt, grandmother, grandfather and so on”。时态“taught”使用正确。中文建议：列举多项时用逗号分隔，并在最后用“and so on”表示等。

× For example, whenever I meet a neighbor or a family friend, I would call them uncle, aunt and.

✓ For example, whenever I met a neighbor or a family friend, I would call them uncle or aunt.

原句时态混杂且结尾不完整：面谈内容多为过去习惯，应使用过去时“met”。“call them uncle, aunt and.” 结尾残缺，改为“call them uncle or aunt”。中文建议：注意叙述过去习惯用过去时，并把称呼列举完整。