Politeness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and use correct verb forms (e.g., "helped me"), and natural nouns/adjectives ("polite" not "politeness").

例: My parents taught me to be polite by modelling good manners. For example, they always said "please" and "thank you" and encouraged me to greet neighbours, so I copied their behavior and learned to treat others respectfully.

提案: Organize your answer with a clear opinion first, then give reasons with linking words like "because" and "for example." Use accurate vocabulary (e.g., "polite people" not "people who polite") and avoid unclear metaphors ("power big palace"). Keep to 2–3 sentences and correct grammar ("they will be polite to you").

例: Yes, I think politeness is very important because it builds good relationships. For example, when you are polite to colleagues they are more likely to help you later, which makes daily life easier.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and then list specific occasions using linking words ("for example", "especially"). Use correct prepositions and noun forms ("people older than us", "people who teach us"). Keep sentences short and avoid repetition.

例: We should be polite in all situations, especially when speaking to older people or teachers. For example, use respectful language with elders and thank service workers who help you.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence describing one specific action, then give brief supporting detail and a result or feeling. Fix grammar ("I gave my toy to other children") and use precise words ("playground", "toy was very popular" instead of "combat").

例: One example is when I was at the playground I gave my favorite toy to a child who had none. I felt happy because sharing made them smile and we became friends.

× I think my mum and dad help me helped me to be polite to others because they are so politeness with other people.

✓ I think my mum and dad helped me to be polite to others because they were so polite to other people.

The sentence has tense and word form errors and a pronoun/verb misuse. 'Help me helped me' is redundant; use past tense 'helped' once. 'They are so politeness' uses a noun instead of an adjective — use 'polite'. Also 'with other people' is better as 'to other people'. Maintain past tense because the learning happened in childhood. Suggestion: say 'my mum and dad helped me' and use the adjective 'polite' to describe them.

× so I see that I saw that and learn from them.

✓ So I saw that and learned from them.

The student mixes present and past tenses. The action refers to past observation, so use past tense verbs: 'saw' and 'learned'. 'Learn' should be past 'learned'. Also capitalize the sentence start. Suggestion: keep consistent past tense for past events.

× That's my answer.

✓ That's my answer.

This sentence is grammatically correct as a short response. No change needed. It functions as a complete sentence.

× Yeah, I found it important because that's the sacrifice part to me because people who polite to and other people have more power than others because if you're polite to others, they will polite with you and they help at you in the future.

✓ Yes, I find it important because being polite is a kind of sacrifice to me. People who are polite to others have more influence because if you are polite to others, they will be polite to you and may help you in the future.

Tense inconsistency: 'found' (past) should be 'find' (present) when giving an opinion now. 'people who polite to and other people' lacks verb 'are' and has extra word 'and'; correct to 'people who are polite to others'. 'Have more power' is better as 'have more influence'. 'They will polite with you' needs auxiliary and correct preposition: 'will be polite to you'. 'They help at you' is incorrect; use 'may help you'. Suggestions: keep present tense for general opinions, include 'be' for adjectives, and use correct prepositions ('polite to').

× So that's a very power big palace.

✓ So that's a very powerful advantage.

This phrase is ungrammatical and uses wrong words: 'power big palace' is meaningless. Likely intended 'very powerful place' or 'very powerful advantage'. 'Powerful advantage' fits context. Suggest choosing appropriate nouns and correct adjective forms: 'powerful' modifies a noun like 'advantage'.

× We should be polite everywhere, but the most important assistance when we need to polite it's when we when we speak to the older people that are older than us and the people who teach you, the people who give a food for you, the people who try to help you

✓ We should be polite everywhere, but it is most important to be polite when we speak to older people, to our teachers, to people who give us food, and to people who try to help us.

Problems: redundant and awkward phrasing ('the most important assistance when we need to polite it's when we when we speak'), incorrect infinitive use ('need to polite' should be 'important to be polite'), repetition ('older people that are older than us'), incorrect pronouns and prepositions ('give a food for you' -> 'give us food'), and inconsistent pronouns ('you' vs 'us'). Suggest simplifying the list, using 'to be polite' and parallel structure with 'to' phrases.

× I have a lot of examples but I have one example that touched my heart.

✓ I have many examples, but one example touched my heart.

Minor issue: 'a lot of' is informal but acceptable; change to 'many' for clarity. Keep past tense 'touched' for the event that affected the student. Also avoid repeating 'I have one example' after saying 'many examples' by combining into a single clear sentence.

× When I was a child I was in a playing sensor and I have my toy to the other kids who don't have that toy because that toy was a very combat.

✓ When I was a child, I was at a playground and I gave my toy to other kids who did not have one because the toy was very common.

Multiple errors: 'playing sensor' is incorrect—likely 'playground'. 'I have my toy to the other kids' lacks correct verb: use 'I gave my toy to other kids'. Tense consistency: past events need past tense 'did not have'. 'That toy was a very combat' uses wrong noun 'combat'—likely 'common' or 'basic'. Suggest using 'playground', past tense verbs 'gave' and 'did not have', and correct adjective 'common'.