Politeness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more direct and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence saying who taught you and how. Use simple past to describe childhood learning, give one or two specific examples of what your parents taught you, and connect ideas with linking words (e.g., "when I was a child", "for example", "so"). Keep to 2–4 short sentences and avoid repetition.

例: When I was a child, I learned to be polite from my parents. They taught me simple rules, for example to say "please" and "thank you" and to greet people politely. For instance, my mother always reminded me to open the door for others, so I grew up practicing those habits.

提案: Answer directly with a clear opinion and give two concise reasons using linking words (e.g., "because", "for example", "so"). Avoid repeating words and ensure grammatical accuracy (use "being polite" or "politeness"). Keep sentences short and specific.

例: Yes, I think being polite is very important because it helps you build respect and good relationships with others. For example, polite behavior can create more job and social opportunities, so people are more likely to trust and help you.

× Well as a child I'm like a new a clear papers.

✓ When I was a child, I was like a blank sheet of paper.

The original sentence has incorrect idiomatic phrasing and word order. 'I'm like a new a clear papers' mixes present tense with plural 'papers' and incorrect determiners. Change to past tense 'When I was a child' to match the time frame, use the idiom 'a blank sheet of paper' (singular) and correct verb form 'was'. Also add a comma after the time phrase for clarity.

× There's no awareness and knowledge in my head so I'm studied by mistake from my parents.

✓ I had little awareness or knowledge, so I learned by mistake from my parents.

The original mixes present 'There's' and present progressive 'I'm studied' incorrectly for a past context. Use past simple 'I had' and 'I learned' to match 'as a child'. Also use 'little awareness or knowledge' for natural collocation and replace passive 'I'm studied' with active 'I learned'.

× They always teach me to P to treat people politely and open.

✓ They always taught me to treat people politely and openly.

The sentence uses present 'teach' but should be past 'taught' for childhood. 'to P to' is erroneous; remove the stray 'P' and use infinitive 'to treat'. 'Open' here should be the adverb 'openly' to modify 'treat' rather than the adjective 'open'.

× Yeah, being being polite is very crucial and essential because people will respect you and give you a lot of opportunities when you being respectful and being impolite or being polite with them, with them.

✓ Yes, being polite is very important because people will respect you and give you many opportunities when you are respectful to them.

The original has repeated words ('being being'), redundant adjectives ('crucial and essential'), mixed clauses and contradictions ('being impolite or being polite') and wrong verb form 'when you being'. Simplify to 'Yes, being polite is very important'. Use 'many' instead of 'a lot of' for opportunities and change 'when you being respectful' to 'when you are respectful to them'. Remove the contradictory phrase 'being impolite or being polite' which makes the meaning unclear.